Category Archives: Joy in the Journey

Believe

NYE 2022-2023 first 100 days (-1)

The focus for 2023 is letting go.

Tomorrow is the first day of 2023.

Yesterday, I was organizing my Christmas ornaments, and there were many that were from before Jim’s passing, which is to be expected after 42 years!..
I was overcome with both nostalgia and grief.

I wanted to let go of the painful grief, but that is NOT what God would want.

When someone dies, if you are a believer in life after death, which as followers of Christ we are, they do not disappear, but rather “go into the next room”. There they wait(and celebrate with Jesus) until we come to meet them again.

3 We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, concerning those who are asleep, so that you will not grieve like the rest, who have no hope. 14 Since we believe that Jesus died and rose again, in the same way God will bring with Him those who have fallen asleep through[h] Jesus. 15 For we say this to you by a revelation from the Lord:[i] We who are still alive at the Lord’s coming will certainly have no advantage over[j] those who have fallen asleep. 16 For the Lord Himself will descend from heaven with a shout,[k] with the archangel’s voice, and with the trumpet of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. 17 Then we who are still alive will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air and so we will always be with the Lord. 18 Therefore encourage[l] one another with these words. 1 Thes 4:13-18 Holcom Christian Bible Study

As I look back on 2020, 20921 and 2022, I’ve been holding onto a lot of grief that I have not allowed God to process for me.  On the other hand, I have had joy and peace because I have this hope in the Lord Jesus Christ.

As I organize years of Christmas ornaments, and remember, joy comes,  tears fall.  

God is Good.

Psalm 30:5Holman Christian Standard Bible 5 For His anger lasts only a moment, but His favor, a lifetime. Weeping may spend the night, but there is joy in the morning.

Believe Joy is a choice.

I can let go of pain, but embrace the love that left the grief in it’s place as I remain here.  It does not mean it is gone, but I’m taking back the power it has over me.  

Hi! My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.

Thanks for joining me in this journey, In His hands and under His wings, ~Christi Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

M. Christine Wildman“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear. If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation. If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest

Copyrights and Legal-eze There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

Advent – Joy – third Sunday of Advent

Today is Advent 15
Light the 15th candle on the Advent Log

Advent Log 15

Advent Log 15

Today is the Third Sunday of Advent
Light the third Advent Candle on the Advent Wreath

The themes for the Sundays in Advent designate this Sunday as the Sunday of Joy.

I have already written much about Joy, so I am going to just link those writings here.

Joy of Jesus

Joy of Jesus

The Oil of Joy

Joy Cross

Joy Cross

Joy has been a struggle for me, and I wrote about it as the answer against one of the Giants in my Land

I have questioned, but the Why of it is, that I must choose to rejoice – choose Joy.

Joy to YOU

Joy to YOU

Joy to the World

Joy to the World

This is one of my favorite Christmas Carols – it speaks the truth of salvation!

And here’s some updated versions:

More Advent Devotions

Advent Day 18 – Faith

Hi!
My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,
~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

M. Christine Wildman“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest

Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

Advent Day 13- Stone

Advent day 13

light the 13th candle on the Advent Log

Advent day 13

Advent day 13

I asked for some help in choosing some additional symbols/names of Christ on facebook.

One option was “The Rock” from Ps 18:46

The LORD liveth; and blessed be my rock; and let the God of my salvation be exalted.

Here is some beautiful piano music to listen to while reading this blog.

here are two of my favorite responses:

Amy Head:

I actually like the corner stone idea or the rock. As you said Jesus is our rock and cannot be moved or shaken. It also made me think of (and I know this is Easter) but when the stone was moved from Jesus’ grave. How stones are frequent in the word and are powerful things no matter how small. Wind, just like sin, is invisible but you can feel it and know it’s there but wind, like sin, cannot move a stone and the stone is like the word of the Lord.

Rebecca Graves:

I kept thinking of the song On Christ the solid rock I stand. I am glad my feet are not on sinking sand. Altars in the old testament we made of a pile of rocks. They were remembrances of what God had done strewn around the landscapes in various places.

And Rebecca’s post brought this reply from Nellwyn Blackmon:

…that reminds me of one of my favorite verses. ..Psalm 40:2

I love having friends that share my faith, and can give me input into how to worship and honor my Lord and Savior.

Jesus is the rock

Jesus is the rock

Jesus is the solid rock on which we stand…as opposed to sinking sand.
Ps 40:2(Ps 27:5; Matt 7:24-27)

He brought me up also out of an horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my goings.

Jesus is the corner stone the builders rejected, as in the leaders of the church of that day.
Ps 118:22

The stone which the builders refused is become the head stone of the corner.

Matthew 21:42

Jesus saith unto them, Did ye never read in the scriptures, The stone which the builders rejected, the same is become the head of the corner: this is the Lord’s doing, and it is marvellous in our eyes?

Jesus is the rock
Ps 61:2

From the end of the earth will I cry unto thee, when my heart is overwhelmed: lead me to the rock that is higher than I.

He is our shelter, our refuge(as that rock):
Ps 61:3

For thou hast been a shelter for me, and a strong tower from the enemy.

There is the verse that says that we either fall upon the rock for forgiveness or the rock will fall upon us to crush us. The relationship with the rock depends on our heart towards the rock.

Another focus is that we are to build a foundation based upon that rock – Jesus.
1 Cor 3:11

11 For other foundation can no man lay than that is laid, which is Jesus Christ.
12 Now if any man build upon this foundation gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, stubble;
13 Every man’s work shall be made manifest: for the day shall declare it, because it shall be revealed by fire; and the fire shall try every man’s work of what sort it is.

We build upon the Rock of Jesus by listening to His words:
Matthew 7:24-25

24 Therefore whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, which built his house upon a rock:
25 And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell not: for it was founded upon a rock.

And if not:
Matthew 7:26-27

26 And every one that heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them not, shall be likened unto a foolish man, which built his house upon the sand:
27 And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell: and great was the fall of it.

Ornaments:

Rocks from Craft store

Rocks from Craft store

affix paper clips with hot glue

Affix paper clips with hot glue

Jesus is the Rock ornament

Jesus is the Rock ornament

These are not typical Christmas/Advent hymn, but are the perfect explanation of why it is so perfect as symbolism for Christ:

Advent 11
More Advent Studies

Hi!
My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,
~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

M. Christine Wildman“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest

Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

Advent 2015 Day 7 – The Colors of Christmas

Advent day 7
Light the 7th Candle.

Advent Log, 7 candles

Advent Log, 7 candles

Advent Log - 7 candles

Advent Log – 7 candles

In 1987, I proposed to my husband that I wanted to start celebrating Christmas. This was smack in the face of our position to not celebrate holidays. Period.
The previous decision really caused a huge rift in our families.

Jim told me that I had to do it in such a way that it totally focused upon Jesus, and not Santa Claus. I’m not sure he believed that I could do so. I had been given a ‘vision’ from God, and I’m remembering that first Christmas.

First – the colors. Why Red and Green?
Red – the blood of Jesus that was shed for us
Green – the new life that we receive when we embrace his gift.

But, what about the other colors?
we started with Red and Green – and then added the other colors for our children:
Yellow – for the glory that shines from Christ’s face.
Blue – for the water that washes us clean
Purple – for the royalty of God, and that in Christ we are priests and kings.

At one time, we created bracelets that were witnessing tools, with colored beads that stood for the way of salvation.

Power Bracelet

Power Bracelet

Eventually, The Wordless Book showed up in our churches, and because of this part of the story of Christ, we embraced it.

Here’s the Pinterest Post for how to make a wordless book.

Wearing something, like the bracelet above, reminds me of the path to heaven.
I confess, there are many times that I forget that I am focusing, or at least, I desire to focus upon, the path to Christ – likeness. I want to be like Christ.

The colors remind me of my God and Savior.
but they also remind me of when we started taking 25 days to talk about Jesus with our Children.

The four of us

The four of us

Our first Nativity

Our first Nativity

Stars with the story of Christ's Birth

Stars with the story of Christ’s Birth

We did our first Advent with the paper ring garland. If we were going to participate in Christmas, it was Jesus all the way. (though, to be honest, stockings have to do with Santa, not Jesus – not sure how I’ve missed that for so many years!)

2016 edit – this year, I am painting ornaments – and I have chosen to put the colors of Christmas on them.  This one is not complete, but it shows how I have incorporated the colors of Christmas.

Thank you Lord, for all the colors that you created.
Thank you, Lord, for giving Noah the rainbow, the symbol of your promise, there will be an end to trials, storms, and waiting!
Thank you, Lord, for giving us our five children, and helping us to teach them about Christ.
Please, Lord, help our children with children to pass on the truths of God’s word to their children.
In Jesus’ Name,
Amen.

More Advent Devotions

Hi!
My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,
~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

M. Christine Wildman“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest

Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

Surgery Scuttlebutt, part six – surgery and recovery

I’m home! It’s been over two weeks since I’ve shared anything…and I wanted to share the update! Surgery was July 17th. I was in the hospital for 7 days.

If you don’t know what scuttlebutt is, please check out

Intro, part one, part two, part three and part four

If you want a great book to help you prepare for, and recover with, please check out Healing and Hope by Christine Carter. Tell her Christi sent you!

I finally got to Chapter 7. Adjust your lens.

The day before surgery, Jim took me to a very unique hotel, the Tudor Arms in Cleveland, Ohio…just down the road from the Cleveland Clinic.

I wanted to have a restful evening with my husband, and that is exactly what we did.

The outside of the hotel is beautiful.

The history of the hotel is amazing.

The entry was intriguing!


We loved the room.

We had a great supper,


And then we went exploring.
In the rooms that were for banquets and balls, there were details that were amazing, but when you stepped back, you could see the whole picture! Go to the website and look at the beautiful weddings!





 

The next day would be my surgery. This whole surgery scuttlebutt series has been how I could be focused upon the minutia of the issue, but instead, I have been encouraged to widen my focus to see the larger picture, and in that larger picture, I have seen the hand of God.

When I widen my focus, then, when I narrow down into the details, I can see God’s hand, even in the little things.
I was unaware of doing this, until I read chapter 7 – Adjust your lens.

Christine had been encouraging me to be intentional in my healing…via the book.

We must be intentional with our thoughts and expand our vision to include the full scenery we are leaving out.

Here are a few of the things that happened while in the hospital:

  • Our daughter Faith was able to be at the hospital with me because of a scheduling boon with her mother-in-law, making it possible to have the children babysat. She braided my hair after the surgery. Big Picture? LOVE!
  • A dear friend came to visit – and one night, it was so perfect because Jim was exhausted and he felt free to go to the hotel, since our friend Suzanne was there with me! The Big Picture? God will provide for our needs!
  • Jim’s cancer treatment got messed up and he had to have some medicine shipped, and it arrived the day after my surgery. Jim and I had forgotten my CPAP for recovery in the hospital. The day of the surgery, our daughter Faith had been asked to bring it, but she forgot. We were able to not make this detail a bit thing. God took these details, and the big picture was that Jim drove back home for the CPAP, was able to pick up his medicine and continue his treatment while staying at the hotel near the hospital! The Big Picture? God had it under control, with all of our frailties in mind, and the possibility that Jim would not have driven home for the medicine except that he needed to pick up the CPAP!
  • My first roommate was apparently a very angry person. I barely remember. Jim remembers her well. He was trying to figure out how he was going to get me transferred so that I was not with her yelling angry presence. She decided to get up, pack, and leave AMA – he says she walked out of the room, yelling, someone get here and take this IV out of my arm…I’m going home! Big Picture? I know that I felt bad for her, and was praying in my drugged state, but God had already made sure that I would have a peaceful room…the woman made her own choice to leave.
  • I had two other roommates during the 7 days, and as they were preparing to leave, they came over to my bedside and sat down and visited with me. I was drugged, so I have no idea why they became so friendly. the Big Picture? When you pray that you will be Christ like, sharing Christ’s love no matter what, people are drawn to you. Jim says that my character was gracious, compassionate and apologetic for bothering the nurses, even drugged.

From Help and Hope:

I finally discovered that if you can broaden your view – expanding the moments when your vision seems stuck – a massive shift in perspective happens.

When I think about my view, I think about this little house that God has provided us.
Out my bedroom window

Out the bay window….

On the swing and from the swing!

There are parks, and places that I can go to immerse myself in beauty. (these were taken on our 38th anniversary, less than one mile from our home!)

There are many other beautiful views…
My grandchildren, who love to come and say hi.
My friends on the internet that check on me daily, from all over the world.
I just have to look outside of myself – see the big picture, and then, I can drill down the focus and see the beauty of a butterfly, a vine ripe tomato plucked by my grandson, or a marigold that he brings me to cheer me up.

Looking at the big picture reminds me that

  • Even though there is pain…there is no infection.
  • Even though there is pain, there is no cancer.
  • Even though there is limited mobility, THERE IS MOBILITY!

The choice is to be grateful, to acknowledge my blessings, and then, my heart is content!

Isn’t that like looking at the stars and seeing HIS handiwork….

Psalm 19:1 King James Version (KJV)
19 The heavens declare the glory of God; and the firmament sheweth his handywork.

and after reading the whole of Psalm 19, I drill down to MY response:

Psalm 19:14 King James Version (KJV)
14 Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord, my strength, and my redeemer.

Part of adjusting my lens also deals with my mental illnesses – depression, PTSD, and anxiety. When I am in a ‘normal’ state, I feel – MUCH.
But I have been drugged…to help me not feel the pain.
I appreciate the “not feeling” pain, as much as the meds were able to help, but this also effects my emotional state, which is tied to the mental illnesses.

One of the concerns for this journey has been the chemical upset that the various medications will cause to my mental health. Even if one didn’t have mental illnesses, the normal mental person would have struggles with depression and being homebound and such. Therefore, we took measures to insure that I would not succumb to the enemy of my mind.

Just the other day, I read a blog by a dear lady that is also struggling with mental illnesses, and writes about her struggle. She opened my eyes to one of the things that I was experiencing…numbness. What is normal for us is to FEEL – BIG. Take that away, and we don’t feel alive. This can bring in some other issues, for me, such as cutting and bingeing…just to feel. These are some of my enemies.

Katie wrote Wait in the Middle, that so clearly explains this strange situation that effects those of us with emotional issues. I encourage you to go read this!

Back to the book, Help and Hope …I prepared.
I saw the big picture – I have illnesses that need medication.
I saw the big problem – without addressing it, I could relapse into suicidal depression.
I made small, detailed plans – meds were laid out for three weeks, photos of joy were put into photo albums, music to encourage was downloaded, a cd player was set up in my bedroom, and my medical providers were aware of the situation.

Have I had thoughts? not of suicide, Praise God – but I’ve started to have a pity party or two…and by being prepared, I was able to stop that party!
Have I gotten down? yes – and I started counting my blessings, because they were all around me…so the enemy couldn’t lie!
Have I had pain? Yes, and I was able to quote verse as things were being taken care of…to mentally handle the pain.

No matter where you find yourself in this journey, there are those that are willing to help!
In Surgery Scuttlebutt, part two, I talked about how I was afraid I’d be alone…and I have not been!

I hope that you have found something in my story to help you in yours. I have one more blog to share with you the various other things that I have learned…please stay tuned!

 
Hi!
My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,
~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest

Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

Introducing BlackWaterFalls Testimony – a book in progress

Why write a book about my past? is it relevant?
The purpose of this book is to shine a light on Darkness that is in our midst. Children are sexually abused every single day and it is ignored. Currently there’s even political people saying that it is okay for an adult to have sex with a child if a child is consenting. This absolutely blows my mind. How can a 12 month old, 18 month old, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 year old(for me, to age 12) actually know what they’re consenting to in the realm of sexual interactions.?

Think the church is safe? I tried to hide out in the church! Protect my children in the church!

And then there’s the church. Because the church is spotless and pure obviously there is no childhood sexual abuse within here! At least that was the false believe until we saw the Catholic Church go through serious problems with priests and nuns, and then the various Protestant churches, and then even in a group that we were part of that was very very intent on keeping girls and boys apart until marriage, it was exposed that the leader and his brother had had sexual situations with secretaries and children who were entrusted to him in his ministry.

What is my purpose? What is my goal?

I hope that my story can be used to take what has been whispered in Dark Places, in secret and shout it from the rooftops to bring truth and light into that darkness. It is because of knowing this truth and bringing this truth and shining the light of God’s word onto it in my life that I have been able to overcome. I hope, and I pray, that this book will help others to seek out the truth, release themselves from the guilt and shame, and even get to the point that they can forgive their abuser so that they are completely released from the chains of Darkness.

The break through came while I was hospitalized when the memories resurfaced.  Yes, there was a memory there for years, like one of those little tags at the back of the shirt that is irritating, but you ignore it.

For those that may wonder – the memories were confirmed by 6 different people – all of whom have gone on to their eternal reward.  

Here’s the Summary – created for a writing conference:

My Blackwater Falls Testimony, by M. Christine Wildman

The painting “Blackwater Falls” illustrates the river of my life journey.  The river journeys from hidden abuses, to a chaotic childhood and Christian confusion crashing me about in rock strewn rapids of teenage responsibility.  I am placed into a precarious life as a woman, with five children, and a marriage on the rocks, and I am propelled towards the waterfall plummet that ends in a violent crash.     The onslaught of repressed memories, the rejection from the church and family, and repeated self abuse issues threaten my ability to survive to serve God again.

How does a child handle 13 years of sexual abuse? What does that do to a teen as she looks forward to a future? Can a marriage make it with millions of IEDs lying in wait to destroy every tenet of trust? Can a human being learn to trust a God that allowed such things to happen?  And can a suicidal, mentally ill person become whole again?

As I learned to apply scripture to my situations, I learned to be still in the storms, embrace the storms, and even dive into the storms to obtain the nourishment for my recovery.  On the other side of the valley of the shadow of death, God is setting up a table for me in the presence of my enemies. It’s my job to walk with Him in the valley, so that I can get to the party!

Here is the painting that came out of me, and helped to set me free:

I’ll make a page to link the updates for this book…and I’d love to have your input!

 
Hi! Thanks for coming!
My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,
~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest

Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

surgery scuttlebutt, part four

Definition of scuttlebutt
1 a : a cask on shipboard to contain fresh water for a day’s use
b : a drinking fountain on a ship or at a naval or marine installation
2 : rumor, gossip

I’m not really planning on this being gossip, or rumor…but, hopefully a drink of fresh water.
Think of this as the Naval equivalent of a water cooler conversation.

My surgery is scheduled for July 17th, 2018.

In this book, Help and Hope while you are healing…no, I don’t get any kickbacks…just the pleasure of sharing this powerful book with anyone that will listen, Christine shares about discovering your passion and purpose.

For Christine’s Story about her book, read her blog, A story about a book!

Chapter 3 is managing the pain…great tool for planning ahead.
Chapter 4 is find your people.
Chapter 5 is discovering your passion and purpose…which I talked about in part three.

I wasn’t done sharing how God has led me through this surgery/cancer/move thing!
I wrote about The End is near in March…updated it a bit in April, and there is a huge list of things I should update to this blog!

here’s part of that hand of God orchestrating my life, to create a beautiful symphony!

I was chatting with a young lady that is training a YWAM to be a missionary.
She was sharing with me how the Lord have been guiding her, and what a joy it is to be in the place which God had planned.

here’s my comment:

One very large prayer is being answered. I am at the church the God called me to 2 years ago. God set me up for going back to the church, by having the pastor be at a doctors appointment that I was at, and I recognized him and I prayed for him.
So I have been able to tell them that I was there when he announced his vision for ministering to the unchurched, the marginalized, and the under cared for in this area. And he was stating that two years ago when I was here helping with my daughter while she had their third baby. At that time they had been praying for a church building, as they were meeting in the back of some government offices. I’ve been praying for this church and for their vision and for the Lord to provide this new church building well new to them because it’s a church building that another church is moving out of, but I’ve been praying for 2 years.

When Faith, our daughter, was telling me about this house that God wanted us to move into, one of the things she said was “oh by the way, your church is just around the corner from your house. Around the corner here does not mean always around the corner, the church is just around the corner on Bears den road” (less Than 3 miles away from our house). That is, the new church building that we are going to be renovating the inside and such and the first sermon is supposed to be the first Sunday in September!!!

THIS was just about the clincher to my saying yes to this house. There are so many other things…but this was KEY!

The other thing, it is such a blessing to sit under a pastor that preaches from God’s word. The United States has so many churches and there are many whose pastors do not preach the word of God. At some point God is going to pour out his judgement on America because we have been given so much in the way of his word, and freedom to live under his word and to share his word. This current generation in our country, has gotten the heart that says if he’s not going to correct me now he’s not going to say anything so go on and sin because God’s not watching. There’s a verse of scripture verse, the talks about that.

Yes, this is me…can’t keep me from stating something about the spiritual needs of the people around me…AND ME!

So what’s the big news about this? It’s that the Lord has allowed us to meet people from the church, and have a real connection between the pastor and his wife, right before I end up going into surgery! There are people in this church that will know of me and that know how to pray to God, how to pray the scriptures, and how to lift me up as I am lying unconscious on the surgery table.

I have had peace about the surgery and the surgeon all along, because I believe God set that up, but now on top of the peace, my heart is again, bursting with joy, that God had my church family planned out for this time, 2 years ago!

the steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord and He Delights in his ways! Though he fall he shall not be cast down, but the Lord holds him up with his right hand.

The points.

  • 2 years ago – I met a chiropractor, Suzanne Shaw, that shared with me about her church.
  • I attended while staying here for three months to enjoy my daughter and her sons.
  • The pastor shared his vision, his leading, his confidence that God had provided a church building for them, in which to reach and minister to more people!
  • My heart was touched…and I hated going back to Florida, because we did not have a church there at the time.
  • Two years go by, I’ve prayed for the church, but not had contact, other than visits with Dr Shaw when I’ve been here.
  • The Lord provides a house for our daughter and son-in-law.
  • The Lord provides a house for us, right next to their property.
  • The Lord planted all of us within easy driving of the new church building.
  • The Lord put the pastor and I at the doctors at the same time!
  • I attend my first service, and he is preaching on covenant…being covenant minded, knowing who we are in Christ and why…speaking life with my tongue, NOT DEATH!! timely message!

Here’s the church website, for Greater Life.
You can follow the instructions on obtaining the podcasts at the greater life website.

The specific sermons are in the Summer of Spiritual Growth, Covenant. So far, there are two parts…though he’s wondering about doing a third next Sunday.
On the youversion app, under events, search for greater life church – boardman. there you will find the notes for these sermons!

What has this to do with my surgery?
Well, to be honest, I would not have moved to Ohio if it weren’t for the cancer.
I would not be having surgery in Cleveland Clinic, if it weren’t for my daughter, and the house near her.
I would not be attending this church if I were in Florida.

My purpose.
There are several.

  • To be in a living church to serve.
  • To be in close contact with my children and grandchildren.
  • To share the gospel.
  • To write my story.
  • To serve others and help them to know the peace that passes understanding that is Christ Jesus

Now, a quick touch on chapter 6 – honor your healing. This chapter was NOT what I expected.
Christine set me up!

“the following exercise will help you find your worth in what may feel like wreckage. Instead of wallowing in all the things you cannot do and the ways you feel you are failing, how about you focus on those things you can do and celebrate that?”

28 years of therapy, if not more…and not one has gotten me to do this exercise.
I’m going through this innocent little book…thinking about how I do need to focus upon honoring the pain, so that I don’t undo the surgery(unlike the pelvic lift surgery in which I lifted things too early and felt the ties inside tear!).

“You are not without purpose in who you are and what you can do. We’ve established many ways for you to discover that truth, and I want you to find more!”

Thanks, Christine! You snuck that one in on me!
Seriously…the exercise had you write the gifts that I have that I love.
She has 10 lines.
Turn the page, AND SHE HAS ME FIGURE OUT A PURPOSE FOR EACH GIFT!!!
So, not only have I done an exercise that therapists have begged me to do for decades…I HAVE CREATED AN ACTION PLAN FOR THOSE GIFTS!

If that wasn’t sneaky enough…she inserts poetry here and there…and this one is titled “You are beautiful”.
She follows that poem with Psalm 139:14
Psalm 139:14 King James Version (KJV)

14 I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.

Those that know me know that if you really want to get my attention…speak scripture!!!
So, I yeild!

And please, join me in worship!!

Beautiful Beautiful by Francesca Battistelli  

I cannot do this without my relationship with Jesus. I did not say BELIEF in Jesus…that’s not enough. I needed a REAL relationship…and that is what HE wants with us. if you are interested, follow these links!

Got Questions provides a detailed explanation of The Roman’s Road.
Billy Graham’s version of the Plan of salvation

 

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,
~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest

Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

Surgery scuttlebutt, part two

Definition of scuttlebutt
1 a : a cask on shipboard to contain fresh water for a day’s use
b : a drinking fountain on a ship or at a naval or marine installation
2 : rumor, gossip

I’m not really planning on this being gossip, or rumor…but, hopefully a drink of fresh water.
Think of this as the Naval equivalent of a water cooler conversation.

My surgery is scheduled for July 17th, 2018.

This is part two. My People….
The introduction explained what’s happening
Part One explained how a book is helping me to focus.

My thoughts from 6/29/2018

Friends, as I work through the book “help and hope while you’re healing” by Christine Carter, I am aware that I’m not hooked into a community for the follow up help. Haven’t joined a church, haven’t made friends other than Faith Gibson’s in laws… And I’ve probably got at least 6 weeks of intense recovery.

Chapter Four is “REACH FOR YOUR PEOPLE” and it exposed some things….

This is a source of fear.

Fear hinders healing.

Fear is the opposite of faith.

Trusting in myself is pride and arrogance, and in this case, probably stupid. And, the Bible says some things about TRUSTING God! Psalm 125:1 is a great one!

Patience is trusting in God’s timing.  I can’t change time.

Faith is trusting in God’s plan. Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things unseen! Hebrews 11:1 King James Version (KJV) I can’t see what’s going to happen!

Courage is facing fear and not letting it control your choices.

The Peace of Christ passes all understanding… It keeps my heart and be mind in Christ Jesus… Who IS the PRINCE OF PEACE.

I don’t know what will happen in the surgery… But God does.

I don’t know what will need to happen after the surgery, but God does.

Everything that led us to get to this house, this doctor, this hospital has been supernaturally orchestrated.

This symphony had been exciting and beautiful. Right now, the music is low, stirring, and anticipating something big. Crescendo, it’s coming… And the full compilation of all the different interludes is coming. The big finale that shouts “God is not dead, here’s surely alive!” is coming!

Stay tuned for the final chapter!!!

Update – I found some of my people on facebook!
I was struggling…and I confessed it….in light of

James 5:16 King James Version (KJV)
16 Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.

For Christine’s Story about her book, read her blog, A story about a book!

 

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,
~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest

Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

Surgery Scuttlebutt, part one

Definition of scuttlebutt
1 a : a cask on shipboard to contain fresh water for a day’s use
b : a drinking fountain on a ship or at a naval or marine installation
2 : rumor, gossip

I’m not really planning on this being gossip, or rumor…but, hopefully a drink of fresh water.
Think of this as the Naval equivalent of a water cooler conversation.

My surgery is scheduled for July 17th, 2018.

I’m reading the book, Help and hope while you’re Healing – a woman’s guide toward wellness while recovering from injury, surgery, or illness by Christine Carter. It’s available at Amazon, or from Christine’s blog.

In my introduction, I shared how I was freaking out.

My next step was to go to Florida, to see the ocean once more before my surgery.

Oh, right, and to touch base with my Florida doctors before major surgery.

I took along Christine’s book, and started to write in it…..

I started working on the lists….
One of which is a prayer list…for all of those that I will be praying for when I cannot do any other thing.

Another is a music list…My Grounding Worship youtube channel. It’s going to be growing!

Another is beauty…Shutterfly has an unlimited 4×6 photo program on the app. So, I’ve gone through tons of photos to have them there to make me smile.

Here is some of the photos…it’s from our drive from Clermont Florida down to Pompano Beach, and we drove through a double rainbow….

The rainbow has wondrous meaning to Christians…Genesis 9:13-16

Another lovely thought about the rainbow comes from Revelation of John – seeing the throne of God surrounded by a rainbow. A neat little study about that is at Patheos by Peter Leithart.

For Jim and I, we are often given rainbow signs in our life.
So, the very presence of this rainbow, DOUBLE rainbow that remained for 15 minutes at least, and that we drove under, was a spiritual gift to both of us. This was a trip to settle some things, and to prepare for the surgery. God not only allowed me to swim in the ocean, He surrounded us with HIS bow in the clouds!

In chapter three, managing the pain, Christine suggests that we should take the time to remember joy! and to write it down. This was where I started thinking of photos. And I decided that things that bring me joy are my family, friends, and God’s beauty. In line with this desire to pull together some of the beautiful places and people of our lives, God gave us a new one, experienced on a back road trip down the center of Florida!

I’ve also been collecting scriptures that will bring me back from the sorrow of pain…and that is another issue that Christine touched upon.

What bit issue sends me into depression? Being a burden.
Chapter four talked about reaching for my people…and I share about that in part two.

 

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,
~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest

Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

surgery scuttle butt, introduction

Definition of scuttlebutt
1 a : a cask on shipboard to contain fresh water for a day’s use
b : a drinking fountain on a ship or at a naval or marine installation
2 : rumor, gossip

I’m not really planning on this being gossip, or rumor…but, hopefully a drink of fresh water.
Think of this as the Naval equivalent of a water cooler conversation.

My surgery is scheduled for July 17th, 2018.

Here’s an email that explains the surgery:

on July 17th I’m having reconstruction of my right kidney…to remove a cyst that looks cacerous, though the official dx won’t be made until they take it out and biopsy it.
 
they want to save as much of my right kidney as they can, because a cyst has developed in  my left kidney over the last four years, though it is not showing evidences of cancer at this time.  8-10 years ago, the one in  my right was determined benign, too.  anyway…the recovery will be long…longer than even the achilles tendon reattachment…during which I thought I’d go out of my mind.
 
Please send me verse, christian songs(youtube) and such that I can meditate upon before, and during the surgery and recovery.
 
I will be in the hospital for up to four days…a little unusual for any of my surgeries…usually, it’s in and out.  Only one , the pelvic lift surgery, was two days.
My artificial cervical disc surgery was two days, be cause the doctor forgot to sign me out.
 
I don’t remember how long I was in for the hysterectomy in 1989…but, those days were a bit different than  now.
 
anyway…I would appreciate prayers…love…and prayers

So, that’s it.
In January, I found out I had probably kidney cancer(they won’t call it official until they take out the mass that lit up with the cancer seeking dye has been biopsied, per Medical protocol – though multiple doctors have slipped and called it cancer).

10 years ago, it was benign.
Supposedly, very few of these turn cancerous…ding ding ding…I won the lottery!

I mentioned the cancer surgery on my fb page, and a new friend, Christine Carter, who lives near Columbus Ohio, where we used to live, offered to send me a copy of her book. I thought, that’s so sweet.
She mailed it, and I opened the box…and I thought, this will be good for me to read while I’m recovering.
Why would I think that?
The name!
Help and Hope While You’re Healing…A woman’s guide toward wellness while recovering from injury, surgery, or illness.

I had read her post that her husband was recovering and said that he probably should read her book now.
That was funny.
But, I had to prepare!!!
On the other hand, I was going to Florida for a week of appointments in preparation(my main doctors are still in Florida), so I planned to take the book along to read and see what’s up.

Then, I opened the book – and she had me at chapter one! “I’ll meet you there!”
She speaks from experience!

Folks – I’ve been where she’s been – with multiple surgeries and illnesses and injuries.
And I HATE WAITING!
MUCH OF HEALING IS WAITING!
Unless you are blessed to receive a supernatural healing, you walk out your healing by faith….and wait for the manifestation!

If there is one thing in my life that i have difficulty with it is waiting.
I prefer to be 15 minutes early anywhere…and I have to practice mercy and grace with those that are late…chronically late…habitually late…as in, tell them to meet you 30 minutes before you plan to do anything to get them there on time late!

I am worse with me.
I’m not healed yet, what am I doing wrong?
Oh, I only had surgery yesterday? You say I’m too hard on myself? HA!!! let me tell you about my artificial cervical disc recovery! ok, most of that was the amazing surgery procedure…but still…replace a cervical disc and I’m nodding my head the next day…come on, we can do better than this with a knee!!! ankle, wrist….I mean, I played the piano just three days after trigger finger surgery!!!

Now…walking, why can’t I walk? Oh, body, you want to shut down? I’ll just walk another mile and…oh, darn…electrolyte crash, call the squad, heart is racing, seeing spots…maybe I should have just sat down!

Running? Who says you can’t run with herniated discs…I’ll show me!!!!
Yep – I showed me, but the wrong part of me did the showing…now I go to a pain doctor on a regular basis for injections, epidurals and blocks!

What are you saying?
I should listen to my body?
That’s not biblical!

Faith is the substance of things HOPED FOR
the evidence of things NOT SEEN….

On the other hand…WHO is sovereign over my life? Jehovah
Jehovah Raphe – the God who heals….
And sometimes He is the God who says BE STILL!
HEAR MY VOICE IN THE QUIET
WAIT ON THE LORD

um….ok, so, I admit that I tend to get out ahead of God…a bit… a lot a bit…to be honest…a lot….often.
And sometimes, yes, he allows me to be put into the position to WAIT upon the LORD, to BE STILL, and to listen to HIM in the quiet.

Christine’s book, chapter two is preparing for the pause…I’m going to write more about that in part one.

For now…if you want more information on Christine Carter and her book, read about it on her blog, A Story about a Book.

 

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,
~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest

Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.