Tag Archives: 100 days

2023 first 100 days – day 1

2023 first 100 days day 1 – January 1

Yesterday, January day 1, I wrote a blog about something very painful to let go of.
I’m waiting for some wisdom from others if this is something that I should share based on my promise to live life real.

sometimes God doesn’t decide to slowly ease you into His path. Sometimes it’s screeching brakes, quick look to see if there is anyone you are going to run over, and a turn before you crash into the exit barrier!

This is what January 1, 2023 had for me.
Something that has been brewing for many years.
Something that affects relationships that are over half of my age old.

And something I did not want to let go.

Is letting go giving up? No.
sometimes letting go is letting God.

and sometimes you realize that the thing in God’s way is ME!

Maybe I will be given freedom to share that post – in the mean time, if God is asking you to let go of something extremely painful, maybe it’s because you are holding on too tight with both hands and need some freedom to see the situation with different eyes.

Hi! My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.

Thanks for joining me in this journey, In His hands and under His wings, ~Christi Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

M. Christine Wildman“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear. If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation. If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest

Copyrights and Legal-eze There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

Believe

NYE 2022-2023 first 100 days (-1)

The focus for 2023 is letting go.

Tomorrow is the first day of 2023.

Yesterday, I was organizing my Christmas ornaments, and there were many that were from before Jim’s passing, which is to be expected after 42 years!..
I was overcome with both nostalgia and grief.

I wanted to let go of the painful grief, but that is NOT what God would want.

When someone dies, if you are a believer in life after death, which as followers of Christ we are, they do not disappear, but rather “go into the next room”. There they wait(and celebrate with Jesus) until we come to meet them again.

3 We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, concerning those who are asleep, so that you will not grieve like the rest, who have no hope. 14 Since we believe that Jesus died and rose again, in the same way God will bring with Him those who have fallen asleep through[h] Jesus. 15 For we say this to you by a revelation from the Lord:[i] We who are still alive at the Lord’s coming will certainly have no advantage over[j] those who have fallen asleep. 16 For the Lord Himself will descend from heaven with a shout,[k] with the archangel’s voice, and with the trumpet of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. 17 Then we who are still alive will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air and so we will always be with the Lord. 18 Therefore encourage[l] one another with these words. 1 Thes 4:13-18 Holcom Christian Bible Study

As I look back on 2020, 20921 and 2022, I’ve been holding onto a lot of grief that I have not allowed God to process for me.  On the other hand, I have had joy and peace because I have this hope in the Lord Jesus Christ.

As I organize years of Christmas ornaments, and remember, joy comes,  tears fall.  

God is Good.

Psalm 30:5Holman Christian Standard Bible 5 For His anger lasts only a moment, but His favor, a lifetime. Weeping may spend the night, but there is joy in the morning.

Believe Joy is a choice.

I can let go of pain, but embrace the love that left the grief in it’s place as I remain here.  It does not mean it is gone, but I’m taking back the power it has over me.  

Hi! My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.

Thanks for joining me in this journey, In His hands and under His wings, ~Christi Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

M. Christine Wildman“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear. If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation. If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest

Copyrights and Legal-eze There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

2022 One Word – LET GO

One Word that will Change Your Life


In 2017, I started following the concept that was written about in this book.
in 2017 it was number my days.


In 2018 it was – well, see how I figured it out.

In 2019 it was Guard your heart.

In 2019, I shattered my shoulder and stopped blogging because I could not sit at the desk and type.

In 2020, my arm was still in rough shape, and we were focusing on Jim’s battle with cancer AND the world wide issue with COVID.

In 2021 – I was focused on becoming the Widow Wildman

In 2022 – I took a journey, entitled “Widow Wildman Wanders West wondering what God wants of her”

In a few days, it will be 2023.

And God has given me another phrase (I don’t get one words like others).

LET GO.

Let go of what?

Let it go??? no, that is too small. I did have times over the past few years that I would find myself singing the Frozen song Let it Go, but that was more ‘in the moment’ type of letting go. This was bigger.

All preconceived notions

All assumptions

All perceived rights

All wounds that control me

22 You took off[i] your former way of life, the old self[j] that is corrupted by deceitful desires; 23 you are being renewed[k] in the spirit of your minds; 24 you put on[l] the new self, the one created according to God’s likeness in righteousness and purity of the truth.

25 Since you put away lying, Speak the truth, each one to his neighbor,[m] because we are members of one another. 26 Be angry and do not sin.[n] Don’t let the sun go down on your anger, 27 and don’t give the Devil an opportunity. 28 The thief must no longer steal. Instead, he must do honest work with his own hands, so that he has something to share with anyone in need. 29 No foul language is to come from your mouth, but only what is good for building up someone in need,[o] so that it gives grace to those who hear. 30 And don’t grieve God’s Holy Spirit. You were sealed by Him[p] for the day of redemption. 31 All bitterness, anger and wrath, shouting and slander must be removed from you, along with all malice. 32 And be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving one another, just as God also forgave you[q] in Christ.

Ephesians 4:22-32, Holman Christian Study Bible

Let Go –

Therefore, since we also have such a large cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us lay aside every weight and the sin that so easily ensnares us. Let us run with endurance the race that lies before us, 2 keeping our eyes on Jesus,[a] the source and perfecter[b] of our faith, who for the joy that lay before Him[c] endured a cross and despised the shame and has sat down at the right hand of God’s throne.
Hebrews 12:1-2, Holman Christian Study Bible

Let Go of control.

For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.
Ephesians 2:10, English Standard Version.

Me? in Control? HA!

28 We know that all things work together for the good of those who love God: those who are called according to His purpose. 29 For those He foreknew He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, so that He would be the firstborn among many brothers. 30 And those He predestined, He also called; and those He called, He also justified; and those He justified, He also glorified. Romans 8:28-30 Holcom Christian Bible Study

So, let go of what I thought my life would be. Let go of what I wanted my life to be. Let go of my ideas about what I’m supposed to be. Let go of my assumptions and preconceptions of other people, even me. I guess it’s a deeper look at Let Go, and Let God.

I’m going to try to write something for the first 100 days, write something a week about my one word, work on sharing my books, work on Itty Bitty Bible Studies, and finishing out some series. I’m

going to let go of things that do not matter, and put on things that do. Join me, please!

Hi! My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.

Thanks for joining me in this journey, In His hands and under His wings, ~Christi Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

M. Christine Wildman“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear. If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation. If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest

Copyrights and Legal-eze There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

TV Show Review – Star Trek Discovery(from my one word 2018)

I admit it, I’m a treky. I have been since the original series. Yes, in the 60’s.
I’ll also admit it – Star Trek does NOT coincide with Christian beliefs.
It was never meant to.
Gene Roddenberry

For me, as an artist and writer, I have enjoyed the cinematic evolution that is Star Trek.
The artistic aspects of the sets, the clothing, the scenes…all of that.
The humanistic study of humans…from a psychological and sociological point of view.

This is my review of the new series, Star Trek, Discovery, currently only available on CBS All-Access.
I utilized the free 7 day trial.

While all of the Star Trek episodes are/were meant to push the social envelope(Kirk kissing Uhura – first mixed race kiss on TV) – I’m feeling a bit pushed over the edge.

What I’m going to write next is NOT politically correct. This is MY review, this is MY opinion. Everyone has one!

Pros:
I love the strong women!
I love the reality of their back stories!
In only 10 episodes, I love their growth.
I love the dealing of PTSD in the life of Tyler, after being tortured by Klingons.
I love the character development.
I love the equality of the story line – mixed skin-color couple, mixed race couple(Klingon and Human) and the same sex couple. Since this is NOT a Christian statement show…I appreciate the balance from a humanistic point of view).

Cons:
This is NOT a show that will encourage my Christian faith.(sometimes, non Christian shows do give me food for thought)
This is a much more RAW Star Trek – while there are good parts…it feels much more savage and violent.
This series has been promoted as the series to push the women’s movement, and the LGBT movement into mainstream.
This is NOT a show that will encourage my Christian faith. (yes, I said that before…I’ll explain the reasoning behind this CON later)

PROS:
As a survivor of abuse, and having PTSD and anxiety issues, and to some extent, having been ‘brain washed’, the little bit of Tyler’s story, having been a POW in the Klingon camp, and having been tortured in ways we do not understand at this time, I am intrigued by his character development. In one episode, he has horrible flash backs and goes almost catatonic, and the other character talks him through the flash back. The words she says to him are the very words needed when PTSD flashbacks come.

Focus on the sound of my voice.
These are not happening, these are memories.
They didn’t defeat you then, they won’t defeat you now.
breathe.

MY Views:

My comfort when going through PTSD flashbacks sometimes needs to be from a human voice outside of my raging head filled with memories and negative self talk. Sometimes, I just need a human to keep me grounded to the present. I believe the Bible has the answer to this. I do not want my heart and mind divided.

1 Corinthians 12
26 If one member suffers, all suffer together; if one member is honored, all rejoice together.

As an abuse survivor that has suffered from every cognitive distortion, I have struggled with not being good enough – and with suicidal thoughts. For a few of my thoughts, I submit:

Like I said above, the episode where Tyler is crashing from the flashbacks of his torture, the Admiral, a Psychiatrist, gave him simple, exact support to pull him back to reality.
A human voice on which to focus, can break through the (enormously loud chaotic) noise in my head.
As a mental healt awareness advocate, this is great exposure to how someone feels going through an episode.
In case someone needs this, here are 21 Anxiety Grounding Techniques.

As a Christian, my healing is based on my faith, my relationship with Jesus and with the Word of God speaking into my life. That is evident in my blogs above. And, prayer, Bible Verse recital, and Worship songs, and the like are VERY important safety/grounding techniques for MY healing. I believe the Bible has the source of healing that is eternal. I do not want my heart and mind divided. I’ve added some Bible verses at the end, but not about mental health at this time.

Powerful women…wow. What a change from the damsel in distress women in the original Star Trek.
Over coming mistakes.
Overcoming abuse.
Overcoming life long ridicule.
and rising up, taking back your power, and using the past to empower your future.

MY views…….
While they are encouraging and inspirational – they do not fill me with the love of Jesus that is MY healing power.

1 Peter 2:9English Standard Version (ESV)
9 But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for his own possession, that you may proclaim the excellencies of him who called you out of darkness into his marvelous light.

You see, I need to remember that I belong to another…Another…and HIS light is a light that I desire…not the light of this world. Or any light that star trek can offer.

Luke 11:34-36English Standard Version (ESV)
34 Your eye is the lamp of your body. When your eye is healthy, your whole body is full of light, but when it is bad, your body is full of darkness. 35 Therefore be careful lest the light in you be darkness. 36 If then your whole body is full of light, having no part dark, it will be wholly bright, as when a lamp with its rays gives you light.”

I’ve written many blogs about how to overcome the above issues with scripture, prayer and a relationship with Jesus Christ. Some are listed above. I believe that the Bible supports women rising up, taking back their power, and using the past to empower their future. I am one of them. I do not want my heart and mind divided.

Tolerance – all are one blood – no color seen by God. Acts 17:26
From a humanist point of view – the equality is refreshing. Including the very “normal” treatment of the prominent gay couple.

MY Views….
From a legal, and humanist point of view – this is great. From an American point of view, all are equal – We the People.
From MY Christian point of view –
all are equal before God, before salvation.
all human life is valuable to God – because he sent his son to die for the WHOLE WORLD.
all have the opportunity to be reconciled to God.
all have the opportunity to be members of the Kingdom of God.
And the method I believe in is through the Lord Jesus Christ’s death, burial and resurrection.

As with all countries – I believe every sovereign country has the right to choose who may enter their borders.
God(Jehovah, Yaweh, Yeshua, Jesus, Messiah, Emmanuel – the God that created the world, and created man, and gave His son, wholly God and wholly man to be the sacrifice for our sins, and indwells the believer with the Holy Spirit, also wholly God) – has given his requirements for entry…and that is to be a citizen.
To be a citizen, one has to believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, renounce their sins, receive Him as Lord and Savior of their life, and live their life to glorify God until we meet him face to face.
I have followed the citizenship steps, and I am a citizen of the Kingdom of God.

Phillipians 3
18 For many, of whom I have often told you and now tell you even with tears, walk as enemies of the cross of Christ. 19 Their end is destruction, their god is their belly, and they glory in their shame, with minds set on earthly things. 20 But our citizenship is in heaven, and from it we await a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ, 21 who will transform our lowly body to be like his glorious body, by the power that enables him even to subject all things to himself.

I believe the Bible, and I do not want my heart and mind divided.

CONS
The violence…period.
the deceit being rewarded.
The gay couple.
The embracing of a very over the top women’s movement.

MY views.
So, basically, my cons are pretty much that this show does not promote my beliefs.
I didn’t expect it to.
But I do need to make a choice…or be divided.

James 1:8King James Version (KJV)
8 A double minded man is unstable in all his ways.

1 Kings 18:21
Elijah came near to all the people and said, “How long will you hesitate between two opinions? If the LORD is God, follow Him; but if Baal, follow him.” But the people did not answer him a word.

Isaiah 29:13
The Lord says: “These people come near to me with their mouth and honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. Their worship of me is based on merely human rules they have been taught.

James 4:8 gives me the solotion:

Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.

Isaiah 55:7
let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts; let him return to the LORD, that he may have compassion on him, and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon.

Isaiah 5:20
“How terrible it will be for those who call evil good and good evil, who substitute darkness for light and light for darkness, who substitute what is bitter for what is sweet and what is sweet for what is bitter!”

For the Christian, it is not as easy as just turning off the tvs how.

2 Corinthians 10:3-6
3 For though we walk in the flesh, we are not waging war according to the flesh.
4 For the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh but have divine power to destroy strongholds.
5 We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ,
6 being ready to punish every disobedience, when your obedience is complete.

2 Peter 2:
20 For if after they have escaped the pollutions of the world through the knowledge of the Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ, they are again entangled therein, and overcome, the latter end is worse with them than the beginning.
21 For it had been better for them not to have known the way of righteousness, than, after they have known it, to turn from the holy commandment delivered unto them.

Psalm 106:35English Standard Version (ESV)
35 but they mixed with the nations
and learned to do as they did.

Hosea 7

Those chapters are convicting, but here is the verse that really settles things in my heart:

Luke 9:
62 Jesus said to him, “No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for the kingdom of God.”

Yes, those words are in red, because they are the words of Jesus.
So, while I like some of the ways that this show is going, and I do not like the raw ness of it with the violence and such, I will discontinue my All-Access membership before I am charged, and choose not to watch this.

This will have an affect on my other watching habits, as well.
You see – the impression I’ve been given for this year is
“the end is near,
the time short…be like Jesus.”

There are so many more eternally profitable things I can be doing with my time.
There are so many more things that could help me to grow into Jesus’s likeness.
Star Trek is not one of them.
many of the things I’ve watched are not.

Why do you watch what you watch?
Does it further you toward your passions?
Does it help you to fulfill your calling?
If not…what do you choose?

Joshua 24:14-15
14 “Now therefore fear the Lord and serve him in sincerity and in faithfulness. Put away the gods that your fathers served beyond the River and in Egypt, and serve the Lord. 15 And if it is evil in your eyes to serve the Lord, choose this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your fathers served in the region beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites in whose land you dwell. But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.”

Joshua 24:14-15

Joshua 24:14-15

I admitted at the beginning that I was a trekky – that is my confession, and I am not going to stop being a trekky.
I’m a child of God – and I have a job to do – and being a trekky keeps my heart divided and distracted.
Several things I’ve allowed into my life are causing division and distraction.
The time is short, the end is near…I need to get about the job at hand, the purpose for which I was saved.

 

Jim & Christi 2017

 

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,
~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest

I want to thank

for the ability to search the Bible online.

Some artwork is from me – ChristArtist. It is copyrighted – by me. Please do not share it without my permission. The same goes for my written work.
Some artwork is from ChristArt – not me! I have purchased a membership, and the art is copyrighted by them.
Some artwork is from FreeClipArt Library. copyrights belong to them.

I’d love to stay in touch with you – we are working on email subscriptions…sign up! 
Soon, we will have a gallery for the art I have created by the hand of God.

There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

Midnight Musings – What did you see? 1-10-2018

Often, I am given things in the middle of the night. Most of the time, I just lie there and beg to go back to sleep! Recently, I’ve been convicted to share these ramblings, and I’ve had some encouraging responses. So – here goes obedience! ~Christi
 

This is day 10/of 100
And this fits into my One Word Phrase – Be Like JESUS

What do you see
When you see me?
What do I do that
Sets your heart free?

Why do you share
Your hurts, pains, and joys
Your deepest regrets,
Your favorite toys?

Why do you speak to me
As if I’m your friend
As if I’ve known you
World without end

I’m only a person
That speaks from my heart
Does that help you open
Does that help you start

To share from your heart
And to share from your life
All you joys and your triumphs,
Your struggles and strife?

Why do you talk to me
As if I’m a friend
When we’ve never met before
And our time will now end.

Is it the safety of
not seeing me again?
Is it the freedom of
Anonymity for the win?

I don’t have the answers,
But I do have a heart
I will listen and share
And I’ll do my part.

You are human,
And lovely, with special worth
You are the only you
That is here on the earth.

I know that you need love
I know that you care
Your job is your passion,
Your life is your prayer.
Because I am open,
You feel free to share,

I used to think it was
Gabriel my dog
That enabled me to talk
Not get lost in the fog

But Gabriel is gone now,
And I’m now all alone,
But still people talk to me
By speech, text and phone.

I have no answers,
But I do know the One
That will listen with wisdom,
And He gave up His son.

It’s the only answer
I have for my trials,
And I know that he’s keeping
My tears in pure vials.

I want to show Jesus,
To all that I meet,
I want to spread love, joy,
And mercy and peace.

I don’t always feel it
I often will fail
Especially to those
Who know me so well.

But those that just met me
And open their hearts,
And tell me their stories,
Explain their life’s charts.

I don’t know why
I don’t know how come
But I do know I have to
Listen until done.

We are the hands, feet and tears
Of Jesus the king,
Aren’t we his ears,
And his tongue – so to sing?

To sing of his praises
To sing of his love
To share with others
The gifts from above.

He puts me in places
I don’t want to be
And there is a person
That needs to be free.

Sometimes, it’s just chatter
Sometimes, it’s their grief
Sometimes, it’s their need
To have someone believe

Someone that listens,
And gives them the boost
To know what their heart needs,
To know what to choose.

I’m not very good at it,
But God disagrees
Because he keeps bringing
The broken to me.

The hurting, the tired,
The ones that may scream,
The joyful, the funny,
That share me their dream.

I don’t know my purpose
I don’t know my cause
I do know my Savior
And I love him because

He loved me before
I had something to love
And because of His love,
I’ll share with the ones

The ones he brings to me,
The ones that I meet
The ones that my heart sees
And connected are we.

It’s not our religion
It’s not of our creed
It’s because of the love
That sets us both free.

No judgement, No hatred
No critical crap
Just love and respect,
We know there’s no trap.

What we say, we respct
What we feel, we empower
And if it will last,
With love, we will shower.

Friends come and go,
Some stay with forever
But friends become friends
When we learn how to share.

I hope what I have
Is the light that does shine,
The salt that does season,
And the love so divine.

No I’m not Jesus –
Not in the flesh,
But I try to be like him,
I do try my best.

Your stories are safe
Within my heart wall
I won’t share them, blare them,
Or use them at all.

Jesus is
a tower of strength,
The righteous run
to Him and are safe.

So to be like Jesus,
I must not share
But hold your stories,
With the greatest of care.

But how do you know
When we’ve only just met
Is it Jesus you feel?
Is it God’s love that is set?

I didn’t say Jesus,
No shirt did declare,
How did you know
In my heart was a prayer?

A prayer that each day,
I could make someone smile,
And let them know Jesus
Can make life worthwhile.

That peace is an option,
That grace is a given,
That forgiveness is chosen,
And Love comes from heaven.

Yes there’s a price,
But one must know the wares
Eternal with Jesus,
And support for my cares.

The price it is worth it,
The cost oh so high,
But to have Lord Jesus
Beside me and nigh

Is worth my whole life
It is worth my whole being,
And because of His help,
‘Neath His shadow I sing.

I hope you see Jesus in me.
© MCWildman 2018

 

Jim & Christi 2017

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,
~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest

I want to thank

for the ability to search the Bible online.

Some artwork is from me – ChristArtist. It is copyrighted – by me. Please do not share it without my permission. The same goes for my written work.
Some artwork is from ChristArt – not me! I have purchased a membership, and the art is copyrighted by them.
Some artwork is from FreeClipArt Library. copyrights belong to them.

I’d love to stay in touch with you – we are working on email subscriptions…sign up! 
Soon, we will have a gallery for the art I have created by the hand of God.

There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

My prayer – 2018 day 4/100

Day has come
The night is gone,
My will to live
Today is strong.

My children hurt,
And so I burn
With desire to help.
To the Lord I turn.

Please be with them,
In all their needs,
For them, O Lord,
To You, please lead.

Remind them of
The verses true
That in their heart
Do speak of you.

Declare to them
That you are near,
And to their prayers,
You listen and hear.

Repentance, Lord,
Is always new,
Because we sin,
And disappoint you.

So day by day,
We have to start,
And end to say,
Please cleanse my heart.

Please draw me near
And hold me close,
For I cannot touch
Those that I love.

But you, O Lord,
Do reach near and far,
In your hands you do hold,
Them, as from the start.

Their children, too,
I must remind,
Are declared for YOU,
To love and to bind.

Sickness and wounds,
And financial burdens,
Are things you handled,
On your earthly sojourn.

You promised your Word
Would heal and provide,
And draw all my children,
Back to your side.

My husband, dear Lord,
The one you have given,
Is struggling, too,
With the trial you have given.

Please touch his heart,
his head his body,
And give us the wisdom
To trust in you wholly.

My heart is filled
With worry and fear,
My head is filled with
What ifs, and tears.

I love you Lord,
And I know you love me,
And I know that you love
My whole family tree.

I pray this prayer,
In Jesus’ name,
And I give over my fear,
To one and the same.
(c)2018 MCWildman

 

Jim & Christi 2017

 

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,
~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest

I want to thank

for the ability to search the Bible online.

Some artwork is from me – ChristArtist. It is copyrighted – by me. Please do not share it without my permission.
The same goes for my written work.
Some artwork is from ChristArt – not me! I have purchased a membership, and the art is copyrighted by them.

I’d love to hear what you think – please leave a comment! Or choose to LIKE me on facebook, follow me on Pinterest, or other social media!
I’d love to stay in touch with you – we are working on email subscriptions…sign up! 
Soon, we will have a gallery for the art I have created by the hand of God.

There are many organizations that support children and families. Here is one that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

2018 first 100 days – day 3 – Priority to Love

I started this year with wondering what my word 2018 would be.

I was impressed with “the time is short” and “the end is near”.
My question to Jesus was “for what?”
His answer was “to be like me”.
My first thought was – does that mean my word for this year is “JESUS?”
Can’t be…that’s so WWJD, and cliche’.
I couldn’t pick a WORD last year, either…basically, I got a verse!

This year, I keep getting VERSES…and the word Jesus just keeps popping up!
And I kept refusing it (ok, today is only Jan 3, and I started this after Christmas, so I haven’t been sinning quite that long…it just feels like it!)

Then, yesterday, dear Ann Voscamp wrote her word for the year. Jesus.

Great – now it’s going to look like my obedience is actually imitating Ann Voscamp!
I can see it now…all those bracelets with the name JESUS on them…everyone wearing them….

GET THEE BEHIND ME SATAN!
HOW GREAT WOULD 2018 BE IF EVERYONE FOCUSED UPON BEING LIKE JESUS???
Ok, attitude checked.
Repentance requested, Forgiveness received.
Moving forward!

My focus this year – is BE LIKE JESUS.
And, yes, my memory word will be…..

And, today, I’m working on my priorities to be like Jesus…#5.

  1. Praise
  2. Prayer
  3. Promises (Bible READING – PRAISE FOR THE PROMISES)
  4. Purpose (writing)
  5. Priorities(those things that God brings to mind each day – family, self care, others, etc.)

Priorities – THOSE THINGS THAT GOD BRINGS TO MIND EACH DAY
Last night, God brought to mind that my husband said something very sweet to me:

Your hair is aging very lovely

I have had years of getting strange types of comments from my husband.
He has a different way of expressing himself than most.
Because of that, I’ve not accepted many of the compliments he gives me.
There is also the issue of horrible self worth, negative self talk, and all those self-condemning voices in my head that out number and out yell him!

This time…THIS TIME…I heard Jesus whisper…listen.

What is he saying?
He likes my long hair – even if I feel it’s stringy
He likes my grey hair – even if I keep trying to convince myself they are tinsel!
He likes my hair, as it’s aging, and he’s not hankering for the day when my hair was young, fresh and …well, I’ve never been happy with my hair! He, on the other hand, has loved my hair from the start!
In fact, it was my hair that almost gave away that he intended to marry me!

Story time:
It was 1979. I’d been out of the Navy for a couple of months. Therefore, I could let my hair grow!

 

I went to dinner with my best friend, Jim – my bible buddy.
He looked across the diner table and said “are you letting your hair grow?”
“yes” I replied…we talked about anything and everything, so this was not strange.


“Great, I always wanted a wife with long hair”

WAIT! WHAT???
My immediate reaction was “I’ll never marry you, it would ruin our friendship!”
Little did I know how close that was to prophecy!
Understand, I was reacting out of the mouth of a child of divorce…I didn’t know married couples could be friends!
Besides, he was the guy I asked about all the other guys that were proposing to me…”is this the one?” “No, I don’t think he is the one”

Hmmm, all along, he had ulterior motives! And, one year later, give or take a month – we were married!

 
So, a comment about my hair goes all the way to the beginning.
GOD wanted me to HEAR Jim’s heart! And I felt loved.
My love languages are quality time and words of affirmation.
His aren’t. hahaha! Isn’t that about the truth for most of everyone?
I need to hear HIS words, trying to speak to me in MY language.

Now, what does this have to do with what God led me to do today?
Remember my word for the year…yep – Jesus.

Colossians 3:23-24King James Version (KJV)
23 And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men;
24 Knowing that of the Lord ye shall receive the reward of the inheritance: for ye serve the Lord Christ.

Ministering to MY husband.
Guess what HIS love languages are?
Acts of Service and Physical Touch…
These are troubling for me for several reasons.

  • I don’t do the hold on until we melt into each other hugs…they are vulnerable.
  • I have physical issues that make hugging painful.
  • We used to live in a cold environment – and kissing too much caused chapped lips.
  • I have physical issues that cause me pain when I do cleaning, decorating, moving – acts of service.

Those who have followed this blog for any length of time, know that I am a broken mess!

I want love, but I’m afraid of it.
I want trust, but I’m afraid to trust.
I want peace, but I’m afraid…period.

So, God told me to listen to the words my husband said – so that I could hear love.
And this morning, God pointed out something that blesses Jim.
He asked me to do it way back in the beginning.
Many life organizers list it as one of the first things to do in the day.
I did it every day in the Navy boot camp – on the top bunk(and I’m short).
WHAT IS IT?
MAKE THE BED!

Yes, something my mom was always telling me how to do.
So, I know the nurses way to make a bed(yes, with flat sheet corners)
I know the Navy way to make a bed (and, no, the quarter didn’t have to bounce, but the top of the bottom sheet and the roll down of the top sheet both had to be 7 inches exactly. the distance between my thumb and my little finger spread out is almost exactly 7 inches).


I know the OCD way – lines must be straight, each side must be exactly the same distance…
I’m learning the ‘IT’S OK TO BE REAL’ way…here’s today’s work:

I lost one of the shams when I was matching colors for the house.
The pillows should not be showing…but I don’t have the strength to pull the quilt up further.
I never intended to have that many sleeping pillows on the bed…and, interestingly enough, I have a similar colored bed at our daughters, with cute extra pillows that the dog loves to walk around with!
I even cleaned up the dresser before taking a photo…
and I can go on and on and on about how this is not up to my standards.

But it is…IT IS…up to my dear husband’s standards!
THIS blesses him.
Actually, me just pulling it up and straightening a bit blesses him.

I get hung up on doing this as unto the Lord, therefore it needs to be perfect.
You know that verse?

Matthew 5:48King James Version (KJV)
48 Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect.

or this one?

1 Peter 1:15-17King James Version (KJV)
15 But as he which hath called you is holy, so be ye holy in all manner of conversation;
16 Because it is written, Be ye holy; for I am holy.

I get so hung up on doing something perfect, or being holy about doing something…that I just don’t.
a quote from my earthly father:

If I can’t do it right, it’s not worth doing.

I do know that neither my earthly nor heavenly father meant for me to just quit.
I do know that OCD, anxiety, and such are Giants in my Land that I need to slay.
I do know that pain prevents me from doing some of the bigger, more impressing things I used to do for my husband(moving whole rooms while he was gone..yeah, that’s not happening anymore!).

What I needed to learn – from listening to God tell me to LISTEN to my husband’s attempt to speak my language was that I don’t have to be perfect in result…I just have to perfectly try.

Language – several years ago, I made a trip to Germany.
I created a cheat sheet of some words I thought I might need to say.
I listened to some of those language trainers to get a feel for the sound.
I was told that the nationals would be offended by me trying to speak their language without getting it right.
My experience? 100% of the time, I might get a smile, but I always got a very warm thank you, and an attempt to communicate – even if they knew no English.

I don’t speak Jim’s love languages.
Jim doesn’t speak mine.
We are as different as black and white, cold and hot, wet and dry…etc.
We’ve been hung up on the other speaking our language.
I’VE been hung up on JIM speaking MY language – and my inability to DO things…or be touched, as a failure as a wife.

I’m not perfect.
Jim’s not perfect.
Jesus IS perfect…and I don’t believe he expects me to BE PERFECT – NOT AS HIM….BUT AS THE FATHER!
And yes, there are plenty of Bible studies about this…and the word meaning and such.
But, I’m simple…this is what the Bible says…and I know that one of Jesus’s love languages is GRACE!!!

Jesus doesn’t ask me to speak the language myself.
He will be my cheat sheet!

He’s commanded me to Love!

John 13:34-35English Standard Version (ESV)
34 A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. 35 By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”

Because HE IS LOVE!
Therefore, if I let Jesus reign in me, work on being like Jesus – I will be able to speak Jesus’s love languages of LOVE, GRACE, MERCY, FORGIVENESS, JOY, PEACE, PATIENCE, LONGSUFFERING….you get the point!
Because of JESUS in me – I can love.

1 John 4:19English Standard Version (ESV)
19 We love because he first loved us.

1 John 3:1
See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God!

and of course:

John 3:16
For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

Romans 5:8English Standard Version (ESV)
8 but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

Jesus asks me to Love my husband.
yes, there are others, too.

If Jesus can choose to come and die for me, while I am yet a sinner, because HE LOVED ME…THE FATHER LOVED ME, THE HOLY SPIRIT even chose to MOVE ME BY GRACE…then to be like Jesus – surely I can love one that is not as ugly to me as my sin was to MY FATHER.

AND surely I can extend grace to my human husband(I have no other), as he attempts to speak love to me.

I made our bed today.
Jim – I love you, and Jesus Loves You! Thank you for loving me, too!

 

Jim & Christi 2017

 

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,
~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest

I want to thank

for the ability to search the Bible online.

Some artwork is from me – ChristArtist. It is copyrighted – by me. Please do not share it without my permission.
The same goes for my written work.
Some artwork is from ChristArt – not me! I have purchased a membership, and the art is copyrighted by them.

I’d love to hear what you think – please leave a comment! Or choose to LIKE me on facebook, follow me on Pinterest, or other social media!
I’d love to stay in touch with you – we are working on email subscriptions…sign up! 
Soon, we will have a gallery for the art I have created by the hand of God.

There are many organizations that support children and families. Here is one that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

2018 – Prioritize – one of my five goals

This is day 2 of 2018 – I’m attempting another 100 days! I started one in 2011.

Today, I’m going to talk about how I set up a priority prayer calendar.
It’s not that difficult…and to be honest, if I utilized it more, I would be praying so much more!
I guess first, we have to decide that praying is important – a priority!

In 2018, I’m going to be focusing on doing the work God has placed before me.
I’m still not sure what my word for 2018 will be…hmmmm.

I’m going to be focusing on the important things upon which to focus:

  1. Prayer
  2. Praise
  3. Promises (Bible READING)
  4. Purpose (writing)
  5. Priorities(those things that God brings to mind each day – family, self care, others, etc.)

My first priority, as led by my Savior, Jesus Christ, is to pray.

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18English Standard Version (ESV)
16 Rejoice always, 17 pray without ceasing, 18 give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

WAIT! HOLD THE PRESSES! CORRECTION!

Actually – I”m going to confess a bit of a change right here….based upon 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18!

Praise, Prayer and Praise(Thanks for the promises)

  1. Praise
  2. Prayer
  3. Promises (Bible READING – PRAISE FOR THE PROMISES)
  4. Purpose (writing)
  5. Priorities(those things that God brings to mind each day – family, self care, others, etc.)

And yet – today I’m going to talk about prayer.
As 1 Thess 5 tells us – PRAYER is crucial…and we should do it ALWAYS! WITHOUT CEASING!

Recently, a friend of mine was wondering how we do such a thing, pray without ceasing.

We all know about how Jesus taught us to pray:

Matthew 6:9
“This, then, is how you should pray: “‘Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name,

Here’s a print for you from The Catholic Resource

There is a nice little study about the Lord’s Prayer in many versions at The Lord’s Prayer Words.

I admit that this is our guide line for prayer.

  • Our Father – declaring WHO our Father is
  • Who art in Heaven – declaring His Kingdom Home
  • Hallowed(Holy) Be your name – declaring our reverence for His name.
  • Thy Kingdom Come – declaring his Kingship
  • Thy Will be done – declaring his Soverignty
  • On earth as it is in Heaven – declaring his rule over heaven and earth.
  • It goes on – to request our needs –
    daily bread
    forgiveness (with admission of OUR responsibility both for our sins and to forgive)
    help to avoid sin
  • Then PRAISE
    THINE IS THE KINGDOM
    THINE IS THE POWER
    THINE IS THE GLORY
    FOREVER!

so does Jesus mean for us to be praying the Our Father without ceasing?
I don’t think so. I know the Catholics do their rosaries with this and the Magnificat…and I admire the tenacity of their focus. They keep themselves focused, with these prayers and others in the common prayer book. I guess I just fine myself needs to talk to God…ALL THE TIME! and the Our Father doesn’t always say what I want to say.

And, it doesn’t give me room to pray for my family, friends and events, and national leaders, etc.
Understand, I am not saying that Catholics, or liturgically based faiths don’t pray for these things! I was raised Episcopalian, and when I need to focus my prayer life, I have gone back to the prayer book.

I have also utilized a wonderful took by Sylvia Gunter.

4 R


YOu can purchase this at her store. The Father’s Business I have no affiliation with her other than my deep and abiding respect for her ministry.

These resources did not help me to know how to pray for my family and friends on a regular basis.
Do I sit down and list off the 100’s of people I’ve met over the years? When I try, I usually fall asleep.
Praying is a great way to fall asleep – if you are like me, you will wake up praying!

So, here’s what I did.

  1. Meranda
  2. Daniel
  3. open
  4. open
  5. Miheret(a sponsored child)
  6. Adam
  7. Open
  8. Jim & I
  9. Rachel, Sarah G
  10. Asha, John, Connie

So, this isn’t a really hard to figure out concept. Pray for people on their birth DATE – if born on the 2nd of December – pray for them every 2nd!
Now, this handles the people, based upon their birthdates.
What about other dates?

Again, I pray for couples on their anniversaries (my brother John and his beautiful wife, JeanMarie, were married on the 15th of May – I pray for their marriage on the 15th of every month).

  1. Faith & Steven anniversary
  2. Jim & Christi anniversary

One could add a due date to remember to pray for a pregnant mamma!
I have a dear friend who died of breast cancer years ago…her family remembers her on the anniversary of her death(Jewish tradition), I remember her, and pray for her children on her birthday.
It is what YOU need it to be to help YOU pray consistently for others!

I could and should have these written down on printed calendars, but what I have done is on the google calendar.
If you set the event as all day, it just gives you a banner at the top of the day.
If you sent the repeat monthly, you get the repeat notification monthly.
To be honest – sometimes I forget the more distant people’s MONTH of their birthday! /o\

To prevent that, you could also use those yearly calendar things in the back of a printed calendar planner – but that gets too complicated for me to put into days. On the other hand, you could use those dates to remember the special days…and transfer them to a basic calendar, and print it. There’s a very flexible option at Print-A-Calendar.
I think I’ll do this with my yearly calendar when it comes!(I’m a calendar snob…yes, I admit it).

Another tool that I am using this year, comes from the blog “My Beautiful Ugly”, and it’s a January Challenge with a free set of printables, and another set, I just bought for myself – for only $5(the price of these things helps to support the blogger/artist for their work – I’m not affiliated with her other than my respect and love of her work).

Please check out My beautiful Ugly 2018 planner and love challenge blog.

I’m going to go print them out right now!

Now, to comment on my friends wonderment…Prayer is talking with God.
Enoch walked with God and was not…probably didn’t want to end the conversation!
Moses talked to God like a friend.
Abraham talked to God, even respectfully arguing with God about his concern for his adopted son Lot, in Sodom and Gomorrah.
David sang to God.
Peter, James and John walked with God…while Jesus lived here…and talked with Him ALOT! If I can take anything from the interaction the disciples had with Jesus, it’s that I can say anything to Him, as long as I remember to listen for His answer.

There’s another way to pray without ceasing…

Romans 8:26-27English Standard Version (ESV)
26 Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. 27 And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because[a] the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God.

This comes right before Romans 8:28 –

28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.

A perfect reminder that when we pray – we have confidence with the Father that ALL things work together for good….not that it will work out the way we want it, but that it will work out the way HE wants it!

I guess that is the main point for me to remember with prayer.
Prayer is not about me telling God what to do in my, or my family or friends lives…
Prayer is letting God know the desires of my heart…and sometimes, Ps 37:4 Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.
Prayer is about letting God take charge of my heart.
In fact, Psalm 37 is a great Psalm about a prayer and a prayerful heart. Psalm 37 talks about rearranging our heart, too! Be forewarned…there are requirements…here’s a couple for starters!

3 Trust in the Lord, and do good;
dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness.
4 Delight yourself in the Lord,
and he will give you the desires of your heart.

verse 40
The Lord helps them and delivers them;
he delivers them from the wicked and saves them,
because they take refuge in him.

Prayer is NOT just about when I pray, how I pray(kneel? stand? lie face down?), or even WHAT I say –
Prayer is the outcome of my relationship with Jesus Christ.
Prayer is the connection with my Best Friend and Savior, Whom I know intercedes for me, and will intercede with Our Father for others.
Prayer is my time with Jesus!
Prayer is Love…
love of God
love of Jesus
love for those I pray for.

I mean, seriously, if prayer is spending time with someone, sharing your joys, sorrows, hurts, victories, and concerns – isn’t that what you do with the one you love?

And what great a privileged it is for we creation to humbly go to Our Creator and ask….because he has asked us to do so.

The book of James gives us so much to think about in our relationship with God, and prayer.
Pray without ceasing – no, not by James…but still as important.

and writing down those we do not want to forget to remember to the Lord in prayer – that can help with the “not ceasing” part.

I do hope this will help you, I know writing this down has reminded me. Here’s to a prayerful 2018!

 

Jim & Christi 2017

 

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,
~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest

I want to thank

for the ability to search the Bible online.

Some artwork is from me – ChristArtist. It is copyrighted – by me. Please do not share it without my permission.
The same goes for my written work.
Some artwork is from ChristArt – not me! I have purchased a membership, and the art is copyrighted by them.

I’d love to hear what you think – please leave a comment! Or choose to LIKE me on facebook, follow me on Pinterest, or other social media!
I’d love to stay in touch with you – we are working on email subscriptions…sign up! 
Soon, we will have a gallery for the art I have created by the hand of God.

There are many organizations that support children and families. Here is one that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

100 Spiritual Walking Steps #51 – Listen AND WRITE IT DOWN

This morning, in my prayer time, I KNEW I had something I was supposed to write.
I KNEW I had a word from God to share.
I also knew that I have a few things to do in order to get up, and come to my computer, and sit down and type it up.
My problem with that is my mental illness – my mental disability – my ‘handicap’ if you will.
In order to write a blog from the LORD – I NEED TO WRITE IT DOWN WHEN I GET IT!

Sometimes, I have written down the scriptures – but not today.
Even when I write down the scriptures, I may not remember, once things have cycled through my rolodex of daily duties, what it was that God was giving me.
If I don’t write it down – I may as well have not obeyed at all – and forget even sitting down at my computer.

That is why there is such a huge time and date difference between some of these steps…
Some, I started writing, and life happened, and I couldn’t remember what I was writing. Those are in drafts…waiting for my mind to remember.
Some, are in notes on a notepad – when I was obedient and wrote something down – but I cannot remember what my notes meant.
Sometimes, I get so busy editing the blog so it looks pretty, and easy for someone to read, and I forget what God’s voice is saying.

Do I stop hearing God’s voice after my morning prayer time? NO!
This has been a lesson I have had to learn.
But, in the quiet of the morning, I hear so much clearer…when I am lying on my bed, only focusing on Him, and my prayers.
It is then, that the writer in me is able to write what she hears – not being distracted – not having the weeds of the world and life float in and distract.

I need to be quiet, body, mind and spirit, to write.
Writing is an act of worship for me – it’s between me and God…and the fruit is what gets shared with others through this blog.
When I am in the ‘God zone’ – there is something that happens to my hands, and I rarely have typos…and I can type VERY fast.

This blog is an attempt to just be obedient to the call to write.
I can ‘feel’ the message in my mind…but I cannot get ‘eyes’ onto it in order to bring it out and share it…my heart will hold it, I know it’s not lost to me, spiritually, but because of my challenges, I cannot type it out. I cannot get it out of my head, and onto the computer screen – or even paper via pen.

Why would God call someone with such a difficulty to write?
I don’t know…and yet, I do.
Anything that I write comes from the Lord…that is, anything that is glorifying to Him! I do write garbage sometimes, later in the day…but early in the morning, when I write things that are blessings to people, those come from the Lord.

I feel like the full field in which the sower sows seeds.
In the morning – the seed falls on good ground…ground prepared by prayer, and worship.
In the afternoon – the weeds of the world start choking it out…I can’t hear as clearly..oh, I hear the basic stuff…but not the things that folks think are really insightful and gifts from God.
By evening…well, the ground is harder…and this is the time that is hardest for me to hear the Lord’s voice…and, it’s not always because my heart is hard, it’s because my inner voices have been telling me all about the things I failed to do that day, possibly starting with, not writing the blog the Lord laid upon my heart.

Moses argued with God that he was not a good speaker…
Gideon argued that he was not courageous…
Peter argued that he was not worthy….
I know what God has called me to do…I have spent time arguing…HE WINS the arguments with “Who made your mouth, ear, mind, hand, legs, back, neck?”
He wins with “who called you?”
He wins with “Do you love me? feed my lambs”
He wins with “If you love me, obey my commands”
HE WINS WITH “I HAVE LOVED YOU WITH AN EVERLASTING LOVE!”

And how could I say no to that?
Well, I have. over and over.
But, HE continues to reply to me, over and over, with the paraphrases above, and others.

You see, My God is a personal God – and I call Him, Abba, Father!
My Jesus is my personal savior, and HE calls me friend.

Ps 19:14 Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O LORD, my strength, and my redeemer.

It breaks my heart that I cannot remember what God shared with me this morning…and that I cannot share it with you.
Some will say “Then it obviously wasn’t supposed to be shared” and they will miss the point.
When God calls a person to do His will, and they refuse, or delay, or object, or whatever….His will is going to be done, but not through that person.
The thing is, what if there was someone that would have read this blog – and had their heart turn, and because I did not speak to them, their blood is on my head?

Ez 22:30 And I sought for a man among them, that should make up the hedge, and stand in the gap before me for the land, that I should not destroy it: but I found none.

Ez 33:6 But if the watchman see the sword come, and blow not the trumpet, and the people be not warned; if the sword come, and take [any] person from among them, he is taken away in his iniquity; but his blood will I require at the watchman’s hand.

These chapters in Ezekiel do not give much leeway for the watch(wo)man that does not choose to stand in the gap, nor shout out the warning to draw in the children of God.

On the other hand, maybe this is the blog I was supposed to write…
What has God called YOU to do?
Be about YOUR Father’s business…the time is short…we know not the hour or the day, and it doesn’t have to be the rapture. Every moment of every day, we are called to speak the truth and shine a light….

I pray that my confession has touched your heart…to turn to the Lord – not take your hand off the plow, and to press on towards the mark of the prize of the high calling of Christ Jesus!

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,
~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest

I’d love to hear what you think – please leave a comment!
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Daniel Fast – Day 3 – Storms

~I am not sharing these to get glory, I’m sharing these to encourage those that are participating in the Daniel Fast.
Bring the Rain

Yesterday’s blog was my heart crying out.
I gave up several things that I was ‘fasting’ – and I gave up on the fast.
I had my husband bring me “Wendy’s” with a large fry. Wendy’s fries are my ultimate comfort food.
I also gave up my fast from TV shows, and just sat and watched TV while I was in pain…

…but something happened…

NONE OF IT HAD ANY SATISFACTION TO ME!!!

The hamburger was just blah in my mouth.
The fries were just salty warmth in my mouth.
The shows that I had previously enjoyed were just noise in my head.

My flesh was weak, but God strengthened my spirit!

Two verses that are very important to me are:

Is 41:10 Fear thou not; for I [am] with thee: be not dismayed; for I [am] thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.
Is 41:13 For I the LORD thy God will hold thy right hand, saying unto thee, Fear not; I will help thee.

But today, this is my passage from the Lord:

Isaiah 40:27 Why sayest thou, O Jacob, and speakest, O Israel, My way is hid from the LORD, and my judgment is passed over from my God?
:28 Hast thou not known? hast thou not heard, [that] the everlasting God, the LORD, the Creator of the ends of the earth, fainteth not, neither is weary? [there is] no searching of his understanding.
:29 He giveth power to the faint; and to [them that have] no might he increaseth strength.

THESE VERSES PRECEDE MY LIFE VERSE!

Isaiah 40:31 But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew [their] strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; [and] they shall walk, and not faint.

I am praying to be set free from the things that hold be back, that poison my attempts to be Christlike.
The first day of this fast, my flesh gave up – but God, by the Holy Spirit, took the pleasure out of those things.
I have heard of Him doing that for drug addicts, smokers and such – but I never thought he would do it for me.

I am humbled.
I am convicted by:

Is 40:29 -He giveth power to the faint; and to [them that have] no might he increaseth strength.

Phil 4:19 But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus.

I know that verse is referring to ‘things’ needed – but I needed strength to go on.

Phil 4:13 I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.

I have always seen this as ADDING strength to me….and yesterday, I was without strength.

Is 40:29 and to [them that have] no might he increaseth strength.

I prayed – oh yes, I prayed…and there was a time in my life where I would have quit, in a very ugly manner.
But this time, there was NO thought of quitting…just praying, and confessing that I had no strength.

Ps 30:5 For his anger [endureth but] a moment; in his favour [is] life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy [cometh] in the morning.
Ps 30: 11 Thou hast turned for me my mourning into dancing: thou hast put off my sackcloth, and girded me with gladness;
:12 To the end that [my] glory may sing praise to thee, and not be silent. O LORD my God, I will give thanks unto thee for ever.

Why is there darkness in the world?
So we can desire the LIGHT!
Why is there sadness in the world?
So we can appreciate JOY!
Why are there wars in the world?
So we can desire the Prince of PEACE!

My signature verse is….

Ps 63:7 Because thou hast been my help, therefore in the shadow of thy wings will I rejoice.

the next verse is:

Ps 63:8 My soul followeth hard after thee: thy right hand upholdeth me.
A nod back to the verses in Isaiah.

It reminds me thaqt God will never leave me nor forsake me….

Heb 13:5 [Let your] conversation [be] without covetousness; [and be] content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.
:6 So that we may boldly say, The Lord [is] my helper, and I will not fear what man shall do unto me.

And that ties it all back to BOLDNESS.
I have been snared by things that are preventing me from being the Christian God wants me to be.
I have been snared by cowardice and fear.

Romans 8:31 What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us?

God is FOR me – Whom shall I fear? What shall I fear? Why shall I fear?

Ps 42:11 Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.

I have a life that causes some people to ask why – and I love this song as an answer, an answer that I need to remember:

~Thanks to me dear friend, June Stephens, for helping me find this song again!