Depression is as depression does
Is that how the saying goes?
Or can depression just be
And I can choose what I will see?
Depression comes and depression goes
And for why, no one knows
But when it comes my thoughts go dim
And my choices planned, become Slim
Depression muddies up the brain
And makes me think that I’m insane
Sometimes I think it’s just a game
Other times chemistry’s to blame
If left alone, it might subside
do I have the strength with it to bide?
And if I tell someone my fears
Will they fill me up with cheer?
Depression is not being sad
And cheering up not always bad
yet sometimes, there is just no clue
What help for me can come from you.
Biology may need one cure,
Triggers can trip me, that’s for sure!
sugar load can cause a crash.
Overdoing it, though it was a blast.
Pain is often a main event
That steals my hope and makes me vent.
Emotional wounds can lead to downs
But even exhaustion makes a sad sound
The joy of the Lord is my strength
But when ears are dull, I’m on the brink
My mind and flesh are often too weeak
But the spirit of God, will often speak
Sometimes in a song, sometimes in a verse
Sometimes in a place that I just traverse
Sometimes in a breeze, sometimes in the still
Sometimes just a touch to strengthen my will
I have stumbled and fallen and needed help to get up
I have struggled and clawed to not drink this cup
I’ve hated the way my body is formed
But I can’t hate the One for whom I was born
I believe I was known in my mother’s womb
I believe there were plans before my parents were two
I believe there’s a purpose for me to be here
And I know God has saved me to share of that cheer
It isn’t about Christmas it isn’t about works
It isn’t about where you call your church
It’s about knowing Jesus as Savior and Lord
And filling my heart with his wonderful word
Because when the darkness comes in like a flood
When my mind can’t remember the love of his words
The Holy Spirit descends like a dove
And reminds me of his Heavenly love
(c) m. c. wildman 2018
Hi!
My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.
Got Questions provides a detailed explanation of The Roman’s Road.
Thanks for joining me in this journey, In His hands and under His wings, ~Christi Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.
“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest
Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.
The son of a friend will be interning with CRU – previously known as Campus Crusades for Christ. If you’d like to support someone I can vouch for in this area, please consider going to Matthew Plant’s donation page.
Ephesians 2:11 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
11 So then, remember that at one time you were Gentiles in the flesh—called “the uncircumcised” by those called “the circumcised,” which is done in the flesh by human hands.
REMEMBER! Lent day 11 we are called to remember what Christ did for us. This blog talks about the importance that God gives to remembering. Here we are, being told to remember something again!
What is Paul telling us to remember here in Ephesians?
That we have two natures.
That we are delivered from the old one, into the new one.
That we have responsibilities because of this great gift.
Romans 5:12 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
Death through Adam and Life through Christ
12 Therefore, just as sin entered the world through one man, and death through sin, in this way death spread to all men, because all sinned.
Galatians 5:16-17 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
The Spirit versus the Flesh
16 I say then, walk by the Spirit and you will not carry out the desire of the flesh. 17 For the flesh desires what is against the Spirit, and the Spirit desires what is against the flesh; these are opposed to each other, so that you don’t do what you want.
flesh is death and carnally minded….. spirit is life and peace Romans 8:6
flesh is hostile to God, …..by implication the spirit is not Romans 8:7 flesh cannot please God….. spirit is in Christ Romans 8:8-9 and Hebrews 11:6
flesh is dead and sin…..spirit is life and righteousness Romans 8:10
Romans 8:11 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
11 And if the Spirit of Him who raised Jesus from the dead lives in you, then He who raised Christ from the dead will also bring your mortal bodies to life through His Spirit who lives in you.
THIS IS WORTHY OF WORSHIP AND PRAISE!!!
THIS IS THE MIRACLE OF SALVATION! we who were dead in our sins…which is everyone ever…when we ask the Lord Jesus into our lives, we are raised from the death of sin into the life of righteousness! HALLELUJAH!!!
Ephesians 2:12-15 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
12 At that time you were without the Messiah, excluded from the citizenship of Israel, and foreigners to the covenants of the promise, without hope and without God in the world.
13 But now in Christ Jesus, you who were far away have been brought near by the blood of the Messiah.
14 For He is our peace, who made both groups one and tore down the dividing wall of hostility. In His flesh,
15 He made of no effect the law consisting of commands and expressed in regulations, so that He might create in Himself one new man from the two, resulting in peace.
Here is the huge result of God’s gift to us through Christ:
The separation from the garden has been removed!
Our sinful selves have been brought near!
Our old dead flesh has been made new and alive!
HE BOUGHT US PEACE WITH HIS DEATH ON THE CROSS! HOW CAN WE NOT BE GRATEFUL AND FULL OF WORSHIP????
Ephesians 2:15-17 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
15 He made of no effect the law consisting of commands and expressed in regulations, so that He might create in Himself one new man from the two, resulting in peace.
16 He did this so that He might reconcile both to God in one body through the cross and put the hostility to death by it.
17 When the Messiah came, He proclaimed the good news of peace to you who were far away and peace to those who were near.
This is how God repaired the separation in the garden!
Ephesians 2:20-22 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
20 built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, with Christ Jesus Himself as the cornerstone.
21 The whole building, being put together by Him, grows into a holy sanctuary in the Lord.
22 You also are being built together for God’s dwelling in the Spirit.
LIVING STONES! stones are dead until God breathes life into them!
1 Peter 2:4-6 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
4 Coming to Him, a living stone—rejected by men but chosen and valuable to God— 5 you yourselves, as living stones, are being built into a spiritual house for a holy priesthood to offer spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ. 6 For it is contained in Scripture:
Look! I lay a stone in Zion,
a chosen and honored[a] cornerstone,[b]
and the one who believes in Him
will never be put to shame![c][d]
At the beginning of this passage we are told to remember! What are we supposed to remember? On the one side, we’re supposed to remember the we are nothing special apart from God. Apart from God we can do no good thing(John 15). In God we can do all things(Phil 4:13).
As we discussed in Chapter 2: 8 – 9 it’s by grace that we are saved through faith and that not of ourselves but it’s the gift of God! Not of Works lest any man should boast. (IBBS Ephesians 2:1-10) We cannot do anything to earn our salvation except to put our hands out and believe and receive from the hands of God!
What else is this that he’s talking about?
That we are no more strangers and foreigners but fellow citizens that we are of the household of God.
That we are living stones.
That we are built on the foundation of the Apostles and Prophets that Jesus Christ is the Chief Cornerstone.
We’re being built together into a holy Temple unto the Lord
We are the Temple of the Holy Spirit! I’m going to go into that more about those last few verses in the next blog!
To conclude this blog, we have two natures that fight, and we need to choose which one will win.
There is a story about a native american father:
A fight is going on inside me,” said an old man to his son. “It is a terrible fight between two wolves. One wolf is evil. He is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego. The other wolf is good. He is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The same fight is going on inside you.” The son thought about it for a minute and then asked, “Which wolf will win?” The old man replied simply, “The one you feed.
In the next blog, we’ll also talk more about how to feed the spirit within us! Psalm 37 will give you a heads up!
but for now…let’s remember that God has given us power to make this choice!
Hi!
My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.
Got Questions provides a detailed explanation of The Roman’s Road.
Thanks for joining me in this journey, In His hands and under His wings, ~Christi Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.
“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest
Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.
The son of a friend will be interning with CRU – previously known as Campus Crusades for Christ. If you’d like to support someone I can vouch for in this area, please consider going to Matthew Plant’s donation page.
Ephesians 1 is all about God’s love for us. At least, that is what Ephesians 1 speaks to me.
Ephesians 2 speaks to me of Grace. First, though, we need to see WHY we need Grace!
Ephesians 2 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
2:1 And you were dead in your trespasses and sins
2 in which you previously walked according to the ways of this world, according to the ruler who exercises authority over the lower heavens, the spirit now working in the disobedient.
Dead
trespasses
sins
ways of the world
according to…well, the devil
Who did we begin as dead in our sins??? In order to understand the greatness of God’s grace, we have to understand the WHY about the need.
We have to begin at the beginning, which is Genesis.
I wrote about this in Advent #6
God created man and he was good, except that it was not good that he was alone…
so God created woman, and she was good.
God created tress in the garden, and they were good…because the garden was good, creation was good, etc., etc.
There were two special trees…knowledge of good and evil, and the tree of life. One they were not to eat of…the knowledge of good and evil, because in that day they would die. Only ONE rule.
Genesis 2:10-17
16 And the Lord God commanded the man, “You are free to eat from any tree of the garden, 17 but you must not eat[g] from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for on the day you eat from it, you will certainly die.”
They knew no shame or guilt:
25 Both the man and his wife were naked, yet felt no shame.
There was ONLY one rule, ONLY one requirement, and everything else was paradise. Yet, their flesh got in the way!
Ephesians tells us that this applies to us as well.
Ephesians 2:3 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
3 We too all previously lived among them in our fleshly desires, carrying out the inclinations of our flesh and thoughts, and we were by nature children under wrath as the others were also.
So does the rest of the Bible. The bible agrees with itself.
Isaiah 64:6 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
6 All of us have become like something unclean,
and all our righteous acts are like a polluted[a] garment;
all of us wither like a leaf,
and our iniquities carry us away like the wind.
Genesis is the Old Testament. In the New Testament in Romans 5, we have at the example of how this applies to us today. read verse 1-11 for hope, then, here’s how God planned it.
Romans 5:12 through one man came sin through one man came salvation
This is the problem – this is how genesis 3 applies to us!
Romans 5:14 through one man death reigned and through the other we have life
Adam was the protype of Christ
Romans 5:14 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
14 Nevertheless, death reigned from Adam to Moses, even over those who did not sin in the likeness of Adam’s transgression. He is a prototype[a] of the Coming One.
Romans 5:15 in the transgression of the one, many died but the free gift from the One is Grace to many Romans 5:16 out of the transgression of one came condemnation and judgement, but because of the transgression of many, through Christ and his obedience we have the resulting justification – the gift. Romans 5:17 from the transgression of one, death reigned. From the gift of Grace of One, Jesus Christ, we reign in life Romans 5:18 through transgression of one came condemnation for many, but through the righteousness of the One came justification for everyone. Romans 5:19 through Disobedience of one many were made sinners but through the obedience of the ONE many were made righteous
Ephesians 2:4-5 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
4 But God, who is rich in mercy, because of His great love that He had for us,[a] 5 made us alive with the Messiah even though we were dead in trespasses. You are saved by grace!
Ephesians 2:8-10 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
8 For you are saved by grace through faith, and this is not from yourselves; it is God’s gift—
9 not from works, so that no one can boast.
10 For we are His creation, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared ahead of time so that we should walk in them.
The judgement is real.
The effect is real.
The gift is real.
Simply put, there are “buts” to this situation!
Ephesians 2:11-22 will touch on our two natures, and why we cannot do it, and why the gift of god is infinite in it’s worth
Josh Groban sings this…and many faith’s have put their own spin on this, but for me…this is my song of thanks to God, through Jesus Christ…because without Him, I am nothing!
Hi!
My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.
Got Questions provides a detailed explanation of The Roman’s Road.
Thanks for joining me in this journey, In His hands and under His wings, ~Christi Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.
“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest
Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.
The son of a friend will be interning with CRU – previously known as Campus Crusades for Christ. If you’d like to support someone I can vouch for in this area, please consider going to Matthew Plant’s donation page.
This is from the end to the beginning…this is not the usual way to read through any book. Some read the end of mysteries first, which I do not understand. On the other hand, I do not want anyone to be mystified about what will happen at the end of the world…so, I start from the end, and move towards the beginning. I only mention the letters to the churches, as those are pretty clear.
Epilogue: Invitation and Warning
12 “Look, I am coming soon! My reward is with me, and I will give to each person according to what they have done. Revelation 22:12 New International Version (NIV)
John and the Angel
6 The angel said to me, “These words are trustworthy and true. The Lord, the God who inspires the prophets, sent his angel to show his servants the things that must soon take place.”
7 “Look, I am coming soon! Blessed is the one who keeps the words of the prophecy written in this scroll.” Revelation 22:6-7 New International Version (NIV)
What will not enter heaven:
Nothing impure will ever enter it, nor will anyone who does what is shameful or deceitful, but only those whose names are written in the Lamb’s book of life. Revelation 21:27 NIV
Those that don’t get in
But the cowardly, the unbelieving, the vile, the murderers, the sexually immoral, those who practice magic arts, the idolaters and all liars—they will be consigned to the fiery lake of burning sulfur. This is the second death.” Revelation 21:8 NIV
Who are not the Friends of God?
Anyone whose name was not found written in the book of life was thrown into the lake of fire. Revelation 20:15 NIV
For what shall we be judged
And I saw the dead, great and small, standing before the throne, and books were opened. Another book was opened, which is the book of life. The dead were judged according to what they had done as recorded in the books. Revelation 20:12 NIV
The enemy
He seized the dragon, that ancient serpent, who is the devil, or Satan, and bound him for a thousand years. Revelation 20:2 NIV
Jesus, the warrior king
I saw heaven standing open and there before me was a white horse, whose rider is called Faithful and True. With justice he judges and wages war. His eyes are like blazing fire, and on his head are many crowns. He has a name written on him that no one knows but he himself. He is dressed in a robe dipped in blood, and his name is the Word of God. Revelation 19:11-13 NIV
The celebration
Then the angel said to me, “Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the wedding supper of the Lamb!” And he added, “These are the true words of God.” Revelation 19:9 NIV
The why
In her was found the blood of prophets and of God’s holy people, of all who have been slaughtered on the earth.” Revelation 18:24 NIV
Another call to repentance
Then I heard another voice from heaven say: “ ‘Come out of her, my people,’ so that you will not share in her sins, so that you will not receive any of her plagues; for her sins are piled up to heaven, and God has remembered her crimes. Revelation 18:4-5 NIV
Unrepentant – refused to repent
They were seared by the intense heat and they cursed the name of God, who had control over these plagues, but they refused to repent and glorify him. Revelation 16:9 NIV
God is just
Then I heard the angel in charge of the waters say: “You are just in these judgments, O Holy One, you who are and who were; for they have shed the blood of your holy people and your prophets, and you have given them blood to drink as they deserve.” And I heard the altar respond: “Yes, Lord God Almighty, true and just are your judgments.” Revelation 16:5-7 NIV
Warning even in the end
He said in a loud voice, “Fear God and give him glory, because the hour of his judgment has come. Worship him who made the heavens, the earth, the sea and the springs of water.” A second angel followed and said, “ ‘Fallen! Fallen is Babylon the Great,’ which made all the nations drink the maddening wine of her adulteries.” A third angel followed them and said in a loud voice: “If anyone worships the beast and its image and receives its mark on their forehead or on their hand, they, too, will drink the wine of God’s fury, which has been poured full strength into the cup of his wrath. They will be tormented with burning sulfur in the presence of the holy angels and of the Lamb. Revelation 14:7-10 NIV
Characteristics of the enemy
It opened its mouth to blaspheme God, and to slander his name and his dwelling place and those who live in heaven. It was given power to wage war against God’s holy people and to conquer them. And it was given authority over every tribe, people, language and nation. Revelation 13:6-7 NIV
The plan of the enemy
Then the dragon was enraged at the woman and went off to wage war against the rest of her offspring—those who keep God’s commands and hold fast their testimony about Jesus. Revelation 12:17 NIV
The enemy
Then I heard a loud voice in heaven say: “Now have come the salvation and the power and the kingdom of our God, and the authority of his Messiah. For the accuser of our brothers and sisters, who accuses them before our God day and night, has been hurled down. Revelation 12:10 NIV
Unbelievers are angry
The nations were angry, and your wrath has come. The time has come for judging the dead, and for rewarding your servants the prophets and your people who revere your name, both great and small— and for destroying those who destroy the earth.” Revelation 11:18 NIV
It’s God’s right
The seventh angel sounded his trumpet, and there were loud voices in heaven, which said: “The kingdom of the world has become the kingdom of our Lord and of his Messiah, and he will reign for ever and ever.” Revelation 11:15 NIV
To his prophets
And he swore by him who lives for ever and ever, who created the heavens and all that is in them, the earth and all that is in it, and the sea and all that is in it, and said, “There will be no more delay! But in the days when the seventh angel is about to sound his trumpet, the mystery of God will be accomplished, just as he announced to his servants the prophets.” Revelation 10:6-7 NIV
Lack of repentance
The rest of mankind who were not killed by these plagues still did not repent of the work of their hands; they did not stop worshiping demons, and idols of gold, silver, bronze, stone and wood—idols that cannot see or hear or walk. Nor did they repent of their murders, their magic arts, their sexual immorality or their thefts. Revelation 9:20-21 NIV
Breastplates red
The horses and riders I saw in my vision looked like this: Their breastplates were fiery red, dark blue, and yellow as sulfur. The heads of the horses resembled the heads of lions, and out of their mouths came fire, smoke and sulfur. Revelation 9:17 NIV
Who is permitted to be tortured
They were told not to harm the grass of the earth or any plant or tree, but only those people who did not have the seal of God on their foreheads. Revelation 9:4 NIV
The bride
After this I looked, and there before me was a great multitude that no one could count, from every nation, tribe, people and language, standing before the throne and before the Lamb. They were wearing white robes and were holding palm branches in their hands. Revelation 7:9 NIV
Who can stand
They called to the mountains and the rocks, “Fall on us and hide us from the face of him who sits on the throne and from the wrath of the Lamb! For the great day of their wrath has come, and who can withstand it?” Revelation 6:16-17 NIV
How long
When he opened the fifth seal, I saw under the altar the souls of those who had been slain because of the word of God and the testimony they had maintained. They called out in a loud voice, “How long, Sovereign Lord, holy and true, until you judge the inhabitants of the earth and avenge our blood?” Then each of them was given a white robe, and they were told to wait a little longer, until the full number of their fellow servants, their brothers and sisters, were killed just as they had been. Revelation 6:9-11 NIV
Now, a quick cover of the first books of Revelation.
Revelation chapter 5 talks about Christ is Worthy 9 And they sang a new song, saying: “You are worthy to take the scroll and to open its seals, because you were slain, and with your blood you purchased for God persons from every tribe and language and people and nation. 10 You have made them to be a kingdom and priests to serve our God, and they will reign[b] on the earth.”
Revelation chapter 4 is John’s vision of heaven. 11“You are worthy, our Lord and God, to receive glory and honor and power, for you created all things, and by your will they were created and have their being.”
Revelation chapters 2, & 3 are the letters to the churches. Whoever has ears, let them hear what the Spirit says to the churches.
Revelation 1 is the introduction, and John’s vision of the glorified Christ. 17 When I saw him, I fell at his feet as though dead. Then he placed his right hand on me and said: “Do not be afraid. I am the First and the Last.
18 I am the Living One; I was dead, and now look, I am alive for ever and ever! And I hold the keys of death and Hades.
The end is coming, but we can begin at the beginning.
Those that have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ are part of the Bride of Christ.
Revelation 22:14
14 “Blessed are those who wash their robes, that they may have the right to the tree of life and may go through the gates into the city.
Ephesians 5:22-33
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her
26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word,
27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.
Revelation is not to be scary, but to be a warning. Revelation is an invitation.
Revelation 22:16-17
16 “I, Jesus, have sent my angel to give you[a] this testimony for the churches. I am the Root and the Offspring of David, and the bright Morning Star.”
17 The Spirit and the bride say, “Come!” And let the one who hears say, “Come!” Let the one who is thirsty come; and let the one who wishes take the free gift of the water of life.
COME!
Hi!
My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.
Got Questions provides a detailed explanation of The Roman’s Road.
Thanks for joining me in this journey, In His hands and under His wings, ~Christi Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.
“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest
Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.
The son of a friend will be interning with CRU – previously known as Campus Crusades for Christ. If you’d like to support someone I can vouch for in this area, please consider going to Matthew Plant’s donation page.
My thoughts for the Itty Bitty Bible Study group on Facebook. (join if you’d like to get these in fb!) The conversation starts Monday, August 20.
Nahum 1 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB) Nahum 1:2
The Lord is a jealous and avenging God;
the Lord takes vengeance
and is fierce in wrath.
The Lord takes vengeance against His foes;
He is furious with His enemies.
I talked in IBBS Nahum 1:2 about God being a Jealous God.
Now I want to look at Avenging God.
Websters defines it as:
: seeking or gaining vengeance an avenging angel
Strongs, from Blue Letter Bible, defines it as such:
naw-kam’; a primitive root; to grudge, i.e. avenge or punish:—avenge(-r, self), punish, revenge (self),
What does that mean for us? I decided to study some cross references via Bible Hub, based on the avenging part of Nahum 1:2.
Why does God say this?
Back to a parent perspective.
You mess with my child, and you have to mess with me! A few teachers found out that I am able to write convincing letters to authorities when they overstepped their boudnaries!
You mess with my brother, you mess with me! well, until my little brother grew bigger and stronger than me.
You mess with my husband, and you mess with me. There have been a few ladies, and some family members that have faced my wrath in this area!
I guess you could even say you mess with my country, and I will remember my oath as a United States Navy sailor.
As a Christian, when the enemy messes with my church – I will go into spiritual warfare and fight until the battle is over, or I am relieved by the Captain of the Heavenly Army.
If this is how a parent, sister, wife and Child of God responds to the enemy coming against their family, HOW MUCH MORE WILL GOD GO TO BATTLE ON OUR BEHALF?
Hebrews 10:30 KJV
For we know him that hath said, Vengeance belongeth unto me, I will recompense, saith the Lord. And again, The Lord shall judge his people.
Deuteronomy 32:35 ESV
Vengeance is mine, and recompense, for the time when their foot shall slip; for the day of their calamity is at hand, and their doom comes swiftly.’
Romans 10:19 HCSB
Friends, do not avenge yourselves; instead, leave room for His wrath. For it is written: Vengeance belongs to Me; I will repay, says the Lord.
Proverbs 20:22 HCSB
Don’t say, “I will avenge this evil!” Wait on the LORD, and He will rescue you.
In the previous blog about a jealous God, Webster’s definition, number 3 was 3 : vigilant in guarding a possession
This is WHY God is vengeful…on our BEHALF!
The truth is, in the Old Testament, He fought for us, because we could not…please read the full chapter of Isaiah 58, linked below, but here is an excerpt:
Isaiah 59:15-20 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
15 Truth is missing,
and whoever turns from evil is plundered.
The Lord saw that there was no justice,
and He was offended.
16 He saw that there was no man—
He was amazed that there was no one interceding;
so His own arm brought salvation,
and His own righteousness supported Him.
Psalm 42 speaks of the pre-incarnate Christ, and God not sharing His glory with another(back to those idols that get in the way) and Him fighting his enemies.
Isaiah 42:12-13 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
12 Let them give glory to the Lord
and declare His praise in the islands.
13 The Lord advances like a warrior;
He stirs up His zeal like a soldier.
He shouts, He roars aloud,
He prevails over His enemies.
There is so much more I could write about God fighting for us.
In Job, we can read about how God has control over what the enemy can do to us…and HE will come out of the whirlwind to deliver us!
In Ephesians, we learn about OUR part, through the blood bought price of Jesus Christ, to stand before the enemy, In Jesus’ name, and to do battle…to be intercessors on behalf of others.
In James we learn about the prayer of the righteous man or woman availing much.
But, who are God’s enemies? The Devil, obviously.
Let’s look at Adam and Eve.
They sinned, they were separated from God by their guilt…so, he killed an animal to cover them.
Eve was spoken to by the enemy. Adam just fell to his fleshly desires.
On the other hand, He is also dealing with our evil/base nature. These were not tempted specifically by the enemy as Eve had been.
Cain and Abel – God tried to reach Cain, and instead, Cain killed Abel.
Jacob and Esau – when Jacob returned, God gave him wisdom to soften Esau’s heart.
Moses and Pharoah – when God was done with the pain caused to the Israelites, He sent plagues and caused Pharoah to let His people Go.
All the battles in the Old Testament – Jericho, Gideon, David’s mighty men…God went before them, and they knew it! sometimes, the failure was because of their own sins.
The ultimate battle on our behalf – Jesus and the Devil. We could not fight off our sinful nature, nor pay the price, therefore, God sent his son to die on the cross, and pay our price. The ultimate battle on our behalf!
Psalm 91 is the ultimate promise for protection in battle.
Psalm 91 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
Psalm 91
The Protection of the Most High 1 The one who lives under the protection of the Most High dwells in the shadow of the Almighty.
2 I will say[a] to the Lord, “My refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust.”
9 Because you have made the Lord—my refuge, the Most High—your dwelling place,
10 no harm will come to you;
no plague will come near your tent.
14 Because he is lovingly devoted to Me, I will deliver him;
I will protect him because he knows My name.
15 When he calls out to Me, I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble.
I will rescue him and give him honor.
16 I will satisfy him with a long life
and show him My salvation.
This vengeance by God on behalf of us is because of a relationship!
When Moses was teaching the people how to understand God, he taught them the words that if we hear, and obey, we are blessed. If we do not, we live under a curse…which to me means that the blessings are removed, or cannot fall upon us.
Nahum 1:7
The Lord is good,
a stronghold in a day of distress; He cares for those who take refuge in Him.
There are many sermons preached about our victory in Jesus.
The point is, the victory was purchased and won BY JESUS – and we have to be IN HIM to dwell in victory.
There is definitely a flip side. Matthew 25 gives the prophecy of Jesus’s return, and how he will separate the sheep from the goats.
Some think they are sheep, but this is what Jesus says:
Matthew 7:21-23 King James Version (KJV) 21 Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven.
Malachi 3 talks about God bringing judgement into the house of the Lord.
1 Peter 4:17 King James Version (KJV)
17 For the time is come that judgment must begin at the house of God: and if it first begin at us, what shall the end be of them that obey not the gospel of God?
To be clear – we bring the curses upon ourselves…just as Adam and Eve did.
I even believe that it is NOT GOD that sends people to hell, but their choices. He has done everything that He could do to open the way! I want to make my choice JESUS!
I want God to fight for me, whatever the battle! Here is the promise:
John 10:28-30 King James Version (KJV) 28 And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand. 29 My Father, which gave them me, is greater than all; and no man is able to pluck them out of my Father’s hand. 30 I and my Father are one.
Here are the warnings:
Luke 9:26 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB) 26 For whoever is ashamed of Me and My words, the Son of Man will be ashamed of him when He comes in His glory and that of the Father and the holy angels.
Philippians 2:12 King James Version (KJV)
12 Wherefore, my beloved, as ye have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling.
Our relationship with Jehovah/Yaweh Creator God is based on his son, Jesus. Our relationship with Jesus Christ is a personal one. It must be based on the Bible truths if we want to believe in the Bible blessings.
If we believe in the Bible Blessings, we must also believe in the Bible curses…the removal of blessings.
What Jesus has me do in the way of obedience may look different than what he asks you to do, but the basics for salvation are the same. Denying Christ is the key to not being with Christ.
Many have read John 3:16, but what about verses 17-18, or 19-20?
John 3:16-20 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB) 16 “For God loved the world in this way:[a] He gave His One and Only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish but have eternal life. 17 For God did not send His Son into the world that He might condemn the world, but that the world might be saved through Him. 18 Anyone who believes in Him is not condemned, but anyone who does not believe is already condemned, because he has not believed in the name of the One and Only Son of God.
19 “This, then, is the judgment: The light has come into the world, and people loved darkness rather than the light because their deeds were evil. 20 For everyone who practices wicked things hates the light and avoids it,[b] so that his deeds may not be exposed.
Wouldn’t it be awful to die and stand before Jesus and hear him say “depart from me, I never knew you”? I don’t want that for anyone!
I’m going to leave some links here so that you can make sure that you have a biblical basis for your profession of faith, and then, I encourage you to go back to the verses about being ashamed…denying…and robbing…as well as the basics of the 10 commandments, which I touched on in the previous Itty Bitty Bible Study – Nahum 1:2a.
My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.
Got Questions provides a detailed explanation of The Roman’s Road.
Thanks for joining me in this journey, In His hands and under His wings, ~Christi Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.
“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest
Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.
The son of a friend will be interning with CRU – previously known as Campus Crusades for Christ. If you’d like to support someone I can vouch for in this area, please consider going to Matthew Plant’s donation page.
God’s Vengeance
2 The Lord is a jealous and avenging God;
the Lord takes vengeance
and is fierce in[a] wrath.
The Lord takes vengeance against His foes;
He is furious with His enemies.
3 The Lord is slow to anger but great in power;
the Lord will never leave the guilty unpunished.
His path is in the whirlwind and storm,
and clouds are the dust beneath His feet.
4 He rebukes the sea so that it dries up,
and He makes all the rivers run dry.
Bashan and Carmel wither;
even the flower of Lebanon withers.
5 The mountains quake before Him,
and the hills melt;
the earth trembles[b][c] at His presence—
the world and all who live in it.
6 Who can withstand His indignation?
Who can endure His burning anger?
His wrath is poured out like fire,
even rocks are shattered before Him
One of the basic things I see missing in Christians lives is the KNOWING of WHO God is.
Nahum starts out this prophecy telling us!
NOTE – I am using Blue Letter Bible to do the work research….I could do it in a Strong’s, but then I don’t have a nice link, and I have to type it all in! Therefore, I’m giving them credit, and sharing one of my Bible Study tools with you!
Here’s the Amplified version of Exodus 20:5 – the 10 commandments…this is the second commandment.
Exodus 20:5 Amplified Bible (AMP)
5 You shall not worship them nor serve them; for I, the Lord your God, am a jealous (impassioned) God [[a]demanding what is rightfully and uniquely mine], visiting (avenging) the iniquity (sin, guilt) of the fathers on the children [that is, calling the children to account for the sins of their fathers], to the third and fourth generations of those who hate Me,
4 “You shall not make for yourself any idol, or any likeness (form, manifestation) of what is in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the water under the earth [as an object to worship].
5 You shall not worship them nor serve them; for I, the Lord your God, am a jealous (impassioned) God [[a]demanding what is rightfully and uniquely mine], visiting (avenging) the iniquity (sin, guilt) of the fathers on the children [that is, calling the children to account for the sins of their fathers], to the third and fourth generations of those who hate Me,
6 but showing graciousness and steadfast lovingkindness to thousands [of generations] of those who love Me and keep My commandments.
Webster’s defines Jealous this way:
Definition of jealous
1 : hostile toward a rival or one believed to enjoy an advantage : envious His success made his old friends jealous. They were jealous of his success.
2 a : intolerant of rivalry or unfaithfulness jealous of the slightest interference in household management —Havelock Ellis
b : disposed to suspect rivalry or unfaithfulness a jealous husband
3 : vigilant in guarding a possession new colonies were jealous of their new independence —Scott Buchanan
The Book of Joshua gives us a bit more insight…
Joshua 24:19 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
19 But Joshua told the people, “You will not be able to worship Yahweh, because He is a holy God. He is a jealous God; He will not remove your transgressions and sins.
This is where Joshua was calling them out to follow God again…to repent…read the whole chapter for context. They cry out that they will follow the Lord…Joshua 24
For what is God jealous?
I don’t believe it’s for HIS respect and honor and glory..though he totally deserves it all.
He’s intolerant of rivalry or unfaithfulness (Webster’s)
God doesn’t want to share his creation with, well, created creation!
Even more to the point, I think, is that God knows how desperate we are for a god to serve….and we will do anything to create one we can see.
I have found this list of scriptures about idols…I don’t know about this site, I just know this is a great list. It was in this list I found the verse I was remembering:
Psalm 135:15-18 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
15 The idols of the nations are of silver and gold,
made by human hands.
16 They have mouths but cannot speak,
eyes, but cannot see.
17 They have ears but cannot hear;
indeed, there is no breath in their mouths.
18 Those who make them are just like them,
as are all who trust in them.
How many idols do we have in our lives? You may not have a statue of some deity on our shelf, but what is an idol?
Yesterday, during service, my pastor, Keith Brunner, defined idols as:
anything we trust more than God.
Pretty simple, right?
Here’s my story from my recent struggles.
I know the Lord, I have Jesus as my Lord and Savior.
I know the Word of God, and I continue to fill my mind with it.
I know I have the Holy Spirit residing in me, and it is my prayer that I don’t grieve Him.
BUT
When the pain comes…I hear the words of fear…that I am not going to make it, that I’m going to get an infection, that I’m going to be in more pain than ever before.
So, what did I do?
Sometimes, I quoted scripture, and prayed and turned on the worship music.
Other times, I whined.
I cried.
I called the doctors and said why do I have this pain….
and then got mad when they said if the pain is so bad go to the emergency room!
I wrote about my struggle in Pain/Peace.
So, where is my little “g” god?
I cried to the doctor FIRST.
I leaned on the emotional eating…and I did this often…even yesterday.
I put more pressure on my husband to pray for me…as if his prayers were better than mine. (this is not to say that you cannot join together, or ask for prayer…I’m confessing my focus)
I’ve put more trust in a car than God at times.
I’ve put more trust in our finances than God at times.
I’ve put more trust in food than God for comfort.
I have put my husband and my family before God before.
and, the ultimate idolatry, I put myself, and my decisions before God when I attempted suicide.
Some folks may have difficulty with alcohol, drugs, cigarettes, lifestyles…
The question is…would you give it up if God asked you to? If it was all taken away today, would you serve God tomorrow?
That is how I check my heart.
37 The person who loves father or mother more than Me is not worthy of Me; the person who loves son or daughter more than Me is not worthy of Me.
38 And whoever doesn’t take up his cross and follow[b] Me is not worthy of Me.
39 Anyone finding[c] his life will lose it, and anyone losing[d] his life because of Me will find it.
Jesus also said
Matthew 22:34-40 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
The Primary Commands
34 When the Pharisees heard that He had silenced the Sadducees, they came together. 35 And one of them, an expert in the law, asked a question to test Him: 36 “Teacher, which command in the law is the greatest?”[a]
37 He said to him, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.[b] 38 This is the greatest and most important[c] command. 39 The second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself.[d] 40 All the Law and the Prophets depend[e] on these two commands.”
He answered: Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your strength, and with all your mind; and your neighbor as yourself.
What happened that God had to tell us this?
The fall.
Eve and the serpent.
Adam and the serpent….
choosing to believe someone OTHER THAN God….
In Genesis 2, we get the description of the Garden that God created for mankind.
As an artist, I put a lot of my heart and soul, as well as mental and physical energy into a painting.
As a writer, I put a lot of myself into what I write.
God is so much MORE than I am.
As I am connected to my creation, so HE is MORE connected.
As I love my creation despite it’s faults, so HE is so much MORE loving with HIS creation.
As I see a mistake, and find ways to correct it, which may change the original plan, but makes that piece more unique, God looks at our mistakes and has a plan to bring about the good HE planned for us, in spite of our mistakes.
God created this perfect world, with beauty we cannot comprehend, and gave ONLY ONE RULE… ONLY ONE!
And Eve put the words of the serpent over the words that she had heard daily, while walking in the garden with GOD!
Adam put the words of Eve, the lust of his flesh, the lust of his eyes and the pride of life over the beautiful relationship he had with God, walking daily in the garden.
Now, let’s say you and I have a special relationship with someone…like a child that we have brought into this world, given blood sweat and tears to raise them up…and they go to others and call them mother or father.
They put their confidence in the other people, instead of you. Those others that do not know the story of the early years, the struggles, the joys, the costs paid, the tears shed…they just know the results of the years of relationship, and benefit from all that went before without paying the cost.
What if, that child chose to spend more time with the others than to be with the ones that held them when they were sick, carried them when they were weak, prayed for them when there were fevers, and unexplained illnesses, and broken hearts and outside wounds from others. What if they broke off relations with you entirely?
What if they denied the good that they had been given to fulfill their desires.
The parents would struggle with jealousy.
God gave Adam and Eve Good…so much good it was excellent beyond our comprehension.
Eve chose a fruit, THE ONLY FRUIT that was forbidden – because it was more beautiful than the ones she had, to have wisdom and to be ‘like God’.
I do wonder about Adam…since it doesn’t say that he was beguiled by the serpent…he just took it and ate!
He’d been with God longer than Eve(ok, not much longer…she was created the same day).
Here we have the two most perfect humans, other than Christ, living in the most perfect environment, having a personal relationship with God by walking with him daily…talking with him daily…AND THEY CHOSE SOMETHING OTHER!
Yes – God would be jealous.
But, that is a human emotion.
And I think that God’s jealousy is even more holy than we, as humans can imagine.
He sees that HIS beautiful creation just chose to die.
He sees that HIS beautiful creation just chose confusion over peace.
He sees that HIS beautiful creation just chose struggle over contentment.
He sees that HIS beautiful creation just chose guilt and fear over relationship.
HE COULD SEE WHAT WOULD HAPPEN BECAUSE OF THESE CHOICES!
And, He knew he’d send His son to pay this price.
Ephesians 2:8-9 King James Version (KJV)
8 For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God:
9 Not of works, lest any man should boast.
Why is God a jealous God?
I believe it goes back to the third definitions of jealousy by Webster: vigilant in guarding a possession.
If you are a parent…how do you look at your child?
I don’t mean as a possession…I mean, in the face of possible danger?
Children are taken away and sold into slavery every day. The sex trade is huge here in Ohio, unfortunately, this is a hub.
I was vigilant in watching out for my children.
I made rules for them when we were out in public.
One of my daughters tells folks that if they mess with her, they’ll have to deal with her mom.
While she makes it sound like I’ll come and beat them up…she knows that I will pray, I will fight, I will turn every stone to make sure my daughter is safe…even today.
I hate those that harm my children…so I have to pray for them…and heal my heart.
I hate those that have pulled my children away from the one true God…so again, I have to pray, and work on MY heart.
I have found that vigilance has returned now that I am around my grandchildren.
Why do I feel so passionate about my children and children’s children?
Because I love them more than life itself.
That is why God is a jealous God…because he is a good good father, and wants the best for us.
This says it very well!
and a Capella:
I’ve written much here about God and jealousy.
Nahum can be read to put God in a horrible light.
We need to read it with the eyes of the New Testament – and understand what Nahum is saying.
I’ll be talking about the rest of this chapter all of this week!
I also pointed to the 10 commandments. I have a help that I have found:
If you are interested in memorizing the 10 commandments, Beyond Today has some ideas.
Hi!
My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.
Got Questions provides a detailed explanation of The Roman’s Road.
Thanks for joining me in this journey, In His hands and under His wings, ~Christi Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.
“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest
Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.
The son of a friend will be interning with CRU – previously known as Campus Crusades for Christ. If you’d like to support someone I can vouch for in this area, please consider going to Matthew Plant’s donation page.
If you want a great book to help you prepare for, and recover with, please check out Healing and Hope by Christine Carter. Tell her Christi sent you!
Here is my latest video to the Wildberry Patch group on facebook…
GREAT NEWS!
The Cancer is gone
the Kidney is healing
the kidney is working like a healthy kidney! YAY!
With that said and done…What was the journey from part six, to this one, the finale?
Well, there was the struggle with confusion with the pain and doctor’s instructions, as I share in Pain/Peace.
There is so many things that I;ve learned on this journey, and I’m still learning, because the wound site for the JP Tube is still an open wound. My skin is bleeding from the tape used to keep the bandages on it for the last, going on 6 weeks. BUT GOD!
God is our creator, and He made us in His image (just read Genesis 1 and 2), so He infused us with creativity! Once the major drainage stopped…I was waiting for an answer…and he has given me one that is giving my skin relief. Also, someone was given creativity for the super special sensitive skin tape…when I have to use tape, I use that now!
That said, I’ve also learned that I need to set boundaries…for myself and others.
What? you say? Boundaries? Christi, of what do you speak??? HAHAHA!
Yes, I have to realize that without that tube in me, I do not have the continual pull on skin that caused sheering pain, and could drive me to my knees! Now, I just get tired. And some base pain from the muscles that have been in rest mode for 6 weeks! First day…I walked out to the garden, and into the garden, to my daughters house, and then back to my herb garden.
This was after I straightened up my own office… yep…putting things away, bending and reaching.
OW! Boundaries…who knew?
I’m going to finish up this series by sharing what I’ve learned, by going through the final chapters in this book. Christine Carter has really been a Godsend to help me take this journey step by step!
Chapter 8 – Own it, Laugh a Little and Get Out.
“Here’s the thing: you are physically broken right now.
You might not have showered for days, and the stench you exude proves it”
Personally, I lived with baby wipes and those neat cloths that hospital gave me to bathe with.
I did wear deodorant.
My hair was always up…because if it was down, folks would know just how dirty it was!
Showering was a torment…and the last shower before the tube came out seemed to almost pull the stitch that held the tube in out of the skin. I mean, seriously…who thought ONE stitch would keep this tube connected to me…ME, the one that hates to sit still so God has allowed some physical ailments to MAKE me sit still. I was afraid that I’d torn something inside…I was afraid I’d caused infection…I was afraid. Period.
This chapter helped me to NOT compare myself to other able bodied people, or even others going through physical trials. I needed to OWN IT…this was the current NORMAL for me…and the only way to get through this valley was to MOVE through it! Not exercise type moving…but, mentally moving.
GO OUT – yes, I chose some opportunities to go out.
With my husband for our anniversary
With a friend to Olive Garden, and a few others places.
Do you know what I struggled with?
The stupid JP Tube showing as a bump under my clothes…no matter how bulky the clothing was.
I didn’t want anyone to look at me and wonder “what’s that under her shirt/dress?”
“You need to be okay with where you’re at right now”
I wasn’t…and I was vain!
God spoke to my heart…how do you respond to someone you see with a catheter? Oxygen? any other health related addition?
“Lord, I would look at them, not the appliance…let them know they are human, and I see them!”
Then humble yourself to learn how they truly feel, and be thankful for such tools for your healing.
This all happened in a matter of seconds, between getting out of the car, and stepping up on the curb.
Just to really drive it home…when the tube was removed, Jim was going to take me out for dinner. As I got out of the car, I started walking into the restaurant, and noticed that the side of my dress where the tube was had gotten soaked with bodily fluid. The little bandage the doctor had put on was in no way ready for the flow…and my dress caught the rest.
“oh no, let’s just go home!”
Ever supportive, Jim started to turn around, and he said Ok…but I remembered this earlier lesson….
“No – I’ll go into the bathroom and see what I can do…and it’s not so big I can’t cover it with my purse. Let’s go in”
Sometimes, when we are given lessons, we get a retest later, to see if we were really listening!
I’m thankful for the mornings I’ve spent on my swing.
And, I’ve found that if I smile at someone…they don’t notice the JP tube sticking out of my shirt, the wet stain on the side of my dress, or the wheelchair that I’m in. They smile back.
I also planned from the beginning to enjoy two FB shows…
Returning the Favor with Mike Rowe
Drybar comedy show
These have helped me laugh, and rejoice in others outside of myself.
Chapter 9 – Prayer and Spirituality
“Religion/spirituality is a significant part of many people’s lives. This is one area that should not be neglected, especially now. …
For me, Christ is the only answer and true source of peace”
Christine allows that there are other faiths that one may be a part of, and encourages all to seek their faith in times such as these, but clearly speaks to her faith as a Christian.
This may be the first time God has had you all to Himself
Not quite true…but, often true that I’m too busy to just be still.
This has been a learning about being still…knowing that HE is God…
declaring that HE is God
acknowledging that I AM NOT God!
Here are a few of my lessons learned:
My worth is based on WHOSE I am, not who I am
asking for help is part of life
Saying No can be healthy
Speak LIFE -scriptures – over my life, body, husband, children, friends…SPEAK LIFE not death
My messenger group of prayer partners…I would get an encouragement every day!
And a huge change in my view point: Let It Go…Let them go!
Some people are in my life for a time
others for eternity.
let those that want to leave, leave.
If I have tried to make sure I didn’t offend, and gotten a response that I did not, then…
It’s not personal, so don’t take it personal.
Seriously – I’ve spend so much wasted time worrying over folks that I thought I had a connection with that just dropped me like a hot potato.
Some that I thought would be prayer partners with me that didn’t even want to receive notifications of the surgery(and they had asked for them).
Some I thought were my best friends, that decided that a hurt, misunderstanding or whatever was far more important than restoring our friendship.
If I have done what I could do…I cannot change their minds. Here’s the Bible on my responsibility:
Matthew 5:23-24 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
23 So if you are offering your gift on the altar, and there you remember that your brother has something against you, 24 leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled with your brother, and then come and offer your gift.
There are more scriptures.
I cannot force anyone to forgive me, I can only apologize, and try to make amends.
If I don’t know what I’ve done, I can’t fix it…and in that case, again, I need to let it go, I need to let them go.
Christine has a great outline for prayer in this chapter, with fill in spaces for one to write them in.
Chapter 10 – A new Day
“Wherever you are on this healing journey, I want to promise you something:
There will be a day when you are done healing.”
I’m not there yet…but, I’m closer than I was 6 weeks ago!
“you will treasure what you discovered during the long, quiet moments of reflection, dreaming and digging deep to find passion, purpose, and new ideas for the road ahead.”
That is what these surgery scuttlebutt stories are all about.
I have restored my faith in Jesus Christ.
I have remembered my calling to write a book.
I have received the love of many, virtual and physical as I’ve healed.
and I rejoice in the way the Lord has met me on each step!
“Some things need to be broken, opened and taken apart to let light in.
Look for the light, my friend. It is shining somewhere in you.”
Amen!
Chapter 11 – And another thing
“After you are all healed and life has returned to its rapid pace, you may still have those lovely little reminders of this difficult season:
that twinge of pain comes along now and again, or maybe your arm doesn’t quite boast the strength it once did….”
I have a 12 inch scar now….and no idea how the JP tube hole will heal.
I have a kidney that I need to treat carefully…I need to seriously consider my diet options.
I have muscles that are achy…and, there are a whole set of side muscles that have been cut that will not like doing side bends, or anything else!
This is my new normal.
And, I thank God for it.
If I had not gone through all the stuff to get to Cleveland Clinic….The End is Near explains the journey…I would not even have this kidney!
I’ve learned to rejoice in hearing the birds.
I’ve learned to laugh with my grandchildren, and my husband, and my friends.
I’ve learned that I can love others from my bed because I live in the age of social media!
I’ve learned that others love me.
And even more so, I’ve learned again, that Jesus loves me!
Hi!
My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.
Got Questions provides a detailed explanation of The Roman’s Road.
Thanks for joining me in this journey, In His hands and under His wings, ~Christi Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.
“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest
Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.
The son of a friend will be interning with CRU – previously known as Campus Crusades for Christ. If you’d like to support someone I can vouch for in this area, please consider going to Matthew Plant’s donation page.
I’m home! It’s been over two weeks since I’ve shared anything…and I wanted to share the update! Surgery was July 17th. I was in the hospital for 7 days.
If you don’t know what scuttlebutt is, please check out
And then we went exploring.
In the rooms that were for banquets and balls, there were details that were amazing, but when you stepped back, you could see the whole picture! Go to the website and look at the beautiful weddings!
The next day would be my surgery. This whole surgery scuttlebutt series has been how I could be focused upon the minutia of the issue, but instead, I have been encouraged to widen my focus to see the larger picture, and in that larger picture, I have seen the hand of God.
When I widen my focus, then, when I narrow down into the details, I can see God’s hand, even in the little things.
I was unaware of doing this, until I read chapter 7 – Adjust your lens.
Christine had been encouraging me to be intentional in my healing…via the book.
We must be intentional with our thoughts and expand our vision to include the full scenery we are leaving out.
Here are a few of the things that happened while in the hospital:
Our daughter Faith was able to be at the hospital with me because of a scheduling boon with her mother-in-law, making it possible to have the children babysat. She braided my hair after the surgery. Big Picture? LOVE!
A dear friend came to visit – and one night, it was so perfect because Jim was exhausted and he felt free to go to the hotel, since our friend Suzanne was there with me! The Big Picture? God will provide for our needs!
Jim’s cancer treatment got messed up and he had to have some medicine shipped, and it arrived the day after my surgery. Jim and I had forgotten my CPAP for recovery in the hospital. The day of the surgery, our daughter Faith had been asked to bring it, but she forgot. We were able to not make this detail a bit thing. God took these details, and the big picture was that Jim drove back home for the CPAP, was able to pick up his medicine and continue his treatment while staying at the hotel near the hospital! The Big Picture? God had it under control, with all of our frailties in mind, and the possibility that Jim would not have driven home for the medicine except that he needed to pick up the CPAP!
My first roommate was apparently a very angry person. I barely remember. Jim remembers her well. He was trying to figure out how he was going to get me transferred so that I was not with her yelling angry presence. She decided to get up, pack, and leave AMA – he says she walked out of the room, yelling, someone get here and take this IV out of my arm…I’m going home! Big Picture? I know that I felt bad for her, and was praying in my drugged state, but God had already made sure that I would have a peaceful room…the woman made her own choice to leave.
I had two other roommates during the 7 days, and as they were preparing to leave, they came over to my bedside and sat down and visited with me. I was drugged, so I have no idea why they became so friendly. the Big Picture? When you pray that you will be Christ like, sharing Christ’s love no matter what, people are drawn to you. Jim says that my character was gracious, compassionate and apologetic for bothering the nurses, even drugged.
I finally discovered that if you can broaden your view – expanding the moments when your vision seems stuck – a massive shift in perspective happens.
When I think about my view, I think about this little house that God has provided us.
Out my bedroom window
Out the bay window….
On the swing and from the swing!
There are parks, and places that I can go to immerse myself in beauty. (these were taken on our 38th anniversary, less than one mile from our home!)
There are many other beautiful views…
My grandchildren, who love to come and say hi.
My friends on the internet that check on me daily, from all over the world.
I just have to look outside of myself – see the big picture, and then, I can drill down the focus and see the beauty of a butterfly, a vine ripe tomato plucked by my grandson, or a marigold that he brings me to cheer me up.
Looking at the big picture reminds me that
Even though there is pain…there is no infection.
Even though there is pain, there is no cancer.
Even though there is limited mobility, THERE IS MOBILITY!
The choice is to be grateful, to acknowledge my blessings, and then, my heart is content!
Isn’t that like looking at the stars and seeing HIS handiwork….
and after reading the whole of Psalm 19, I drill down to MY response:
Psalm 19:14 King James Version (KJV)
14 Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord, my strength, and my redeemer.
Part of adjusting my lens also deals with my mental illnesses – depression, PTSD, and anxiety. When I am in a ‘normal’ state, I feel – MUCH.
But I have been drugged…to help me not feel the pain.
I appreciate the “not feeling” pain, as much as the meds were able to help, but this also effects my emotional state, which is tied to the mental illnesses.
One of the concerns for this journey has been the chemical upset that the various medications will cause to my mental health. Even if one didn’t have mental illnesses, the normal mental person would have struggles with depression and being homebound and such. Therefore, we took measures to insure that I would not succumb to the enemy of my mind.
Just the other day, I read a blog by a dear lady that is also struggling with mental illnesses, and writes about her struggle. She opened my eyes to one of the things that I was experiencing…numbness. What is normal for us is to FEEL – BIG. Take that away, and we don’t feel alive. This can bring in some other issues, for me, such as cutting and bingeing…just to feel. These are some of my enemies.
Katie wrote Wait in the Middle, that so clearly explains this strange situation that effects those of us with emotional issues. I encourage you to go read this!
Back to the book, Help and Hope …I prepared.
I saw the big picture – I have illnesses that need medication.
I saw the big problem – without addressing it, I could relapse into suicidal depression.
I made small, detailed plans – meds were laid out for three weeks, photos of joy were put into photo albums, music to encourage was downloaded, a cd player was set up in my bedroom, and my medical providers were aware of the situation.
Have I had thoughts? not of suicide, Praise God – but I’ve started to have a pity party or two…and by being prepared, I was able to stop that party!
Have I gotten down? yes – and I started counting my blessings, because they were all around me…so the enemy couldn’t lie!
Have I had pain? Yes, and I was able to quote verse as things were being taken care of…to mentally handle the pain.
No matter where you find yourself in this journey, there are those that are willing to help!
In Surgery Scuttlebutt, part two, I talked about how I was afraid I’d be alone…and I have not been!
I hope that you have found something in my story to help you in yours. I have one more blog to share with you the various other things that I have learned…please stay tuned!
Hi!
My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.
Got Questions provides a detailed explanation of The Roman’s Road.
Thanks for joining me in this journey, In His hands and under His wings, ~Christi Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.
“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest
Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.
The son of a friend will be interning with CRU – previously known as Campus Crusades for Christ. If you’d like to support someone I can vouch for in this area, please consider going to Matthew Plant’s donation page.
If you want a great book to help you prepare for, and recover with, please check out Help and Hope by Christine Carter. Tell her Christi sent you!
Tomorrow is S-day! my surgery.
In part four, I talked about finding(being led to) our new church, and being blessed by the current sermon series.
I mentioned that I prayed that Pastor Keith would continue for this past Sunday.
AND HE DID!
23 For verily I say unto you, That whosoever shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; and shall not doubt in his heart, but shall believe that those things which he saith shall come to pass; he shall have whatsoever he saith.
shall say….
and not doubt….but believe
HE SHALL HAVE WHATSOEVER HE SAITH!
Now – this is not a name it claim it thing…been there, done that. Never got the t-shirt! But, I did get burned!
God is bound to His word and His plans…it’s not saying I have a Ferrari and poof – I have a Ferrari….
No – it must line up with the promises that GOD has given us…AND, that the devil wants to steal, kill and destroy!
8 Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour:
9 Whom resist stedfast in the faith, knowing that the same afflictions are accomplished in your brethren that are in the world.
10 The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.
Jesus was giving us power – over the enemy! Not to get rich!
we have a choice what goes into our minds AND STAYS!
we do have a choice what WE put into our minds!
Looking at this upcoming surgery..I HAVE A CHOICE!
I can be Christ like or I can be Christi like.
I can serve Christ or I can serve Christi.
Christi needs to be CHRISTi…Christ is greater, i am lesser.
14 Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord, my strength, and my redeemer.
Jesus said that I could speak to a mountain, and it would be removed.
I don’t have a mountain that needs to be moved…I have a cyst…a mass…a ‘suspicious’ mass that off the record has been called cancer. (legalese about why they can’t call it cancer without a biopsy, which won’t happen until after the surgery).
Yesterday, as the pastor was preaching about life and death in our tongues…I received a word…I believe…for me.
This preparation for surgery has been very interesting.
FIRST – God waited until the demon of suicide was defeated in my life(well, until I let go of that demon I’d known for many years…sometimes we become familiar with our demons and don’t know how to let go!)
SECOND – God waited until I was settled in with wanting to LIVE! (there is a difference between not wanting to die and wanting to live).
THIRD – God waited until I was ready to give up everything to follow his call – back to Ohio – to Youngstown, Ohio! (seriously, from my hometown, we didn’t have much good to say about Youngstown – and if I was coming back to Ohio, I was expecting to go back to MY hometown)
FOURTH – God timed the whole thing, from Faith’s house, to the timing of finding the mass, to finding the doctor that is the most experienced in the nation with this type of specialized removal of the mass and saving the kidney.
FIFTH – HE BROUGHT ME TO THE CHURCH HE CALLED ME TO 2 YEARS AGO JUST AS THEY ARE ABOUT TO MOVE INTO THE FULFILLMENT OF THE VISION OF A BUILDING…which I was a part of the announcement meeting!( I have to write up an update…because the Lord has orchestrated so much more since April!)
The word I received was to speak to the cyst that it would be removed.
I asked God to heal me…and that took a work of God to get me to the point that I even asked for that!
He didn’t “poof” heal me…and I have experienced that before, but rather, he orchestrated the above steps to get me to this doctor!
If he’d wanted the whole kidney out…he could have just had me do the surgery in January in Florida!
No, HE orchestrated events so that I met THIS doctor, that has THIS skill, and I am here.
I speak to the mass – MOVE!
I speak to the cancer – LEAVE!
I speak to all those that are involved in my surgery and care tomorrow – PEACE – CLARITY – WISDOM
and I speak to the enemy – GET THEE BEHIND ME SATAN – YOU HAVE NO PLACE IN THIS STORY OTHER THAN THE BEATEN FALLEN FOE. IN JESUS’ NAME BY JESUS’ BLOOD BECAUSE GOD PROMISED ME, IN CHRIST, BECAUSE OF THE PROMISE TO ABRAHAM AND HIS SEED!
Back to Sunday’s sermon. Pastor Keith shared a vision, very similar to a vision that I have had about that church…meaning that this is where I belong, for such a time as this! I can join in with the vision, but the reason I am sharing this is that Pastor sharing His vision, that was so similar to the one I’ve been given, just confirms that I am right in the middle of the will of God! That’s not always the case… it’s is what my heart desires, but, my flesh often sways my off track. I AM WHERE I AM SUPPOSED TO BE AT THE TIME IN WHICH I AM TO BE!
I want to do a study on Psalm 91…but, my pastor just did an amazing one! In Part four, I gave all the instructions on how to find that sermon. look at the podcasts at Your Greater Life.
I WILL SAY…I think I’ve covered that above.
TRUST …believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and thou shalt be saved. Acts 16:11
Here’s the thing I’m getting at. Death is a risk whenever anyone goes into surgery.
I am at peace. I don’t fear the surgery, I don’t fear death. Why not? because I know where I am going! Philippians 1:21 King James Version (KJV)
21 For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.
Go ahead, read it in context….and for more info, I have shared my thoughts on Philippians 1:18-21.
YOU CAN KNOW WHERE YOU ARE GOING! I pray that each one that reads this will take this seriously.
Got Questions provides a detailed explanation of The Roman’s Road.
Billy Graham’s version of the Plan of salvation
Now, I do not believe that I will die…but rather live to declare the glory of God!
10 The name of Yahweh is a strong tower;
the righteous run to it and are protected.
It is in the name of Jesus that I dwell in the secret place of the most high, and I am protected.
I pray that each person that reads this will also know the name of Jesus, by inviting HIM into your heart to be Lord and Savior, and to choose to dwell in HIS secret place.
He is my hiding place! And he can be yours! Psalm 32:7 New International Version (NIV)
7 You are my hiding place;
you will protect me from trouble
and surround me with songs of deliverance.
another way that I have made images is via the youversion app. GREAT app for having your bible at your fingertips and bible studies, and our pastor puts our sermon series notes in there so that we can take notes right on the phone with the scriptures! woo hoo!
Thanks for joining me in this journey, In His hands and under His wings, ~Christi Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.
“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest
Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.
The son of a friend will be interning with CRU – previously known as Campus Crusades for Christ. If you’d like to support someone I can vouch for in this area, please consider going to Matthew Plant’s donation page.
Definition of scuttlebutt 1 a : a cask on shipboard to contain fresh water for a day’s use b : a drinking fountain on a ship or at a naval or marine installation 2 : rumor, gossip
I’m not really planning on this being gossip, or rumor…but, hopefully a drink of fresh water. Think of this as the Naval equivalent of a water cooler conversation.
My surgery is scheduled for July 17th, 2018.
In this book, Help and Hope while you are healing…no, I don’t get any kickbacks…just the pleasure of sharing this powerful book with anyone that will listen, Christine shares about discovering your passion and purpose.
Chapter 3 is managing the pain…great tool for planning ahead.
Chapter 4 is find your people.
Chapter 5 is discovering your passion and purpose…which I talked about in part three.
I wasn’t done sharing how God has led me through this surgery/cancer/move thing!
I wrote about The End is near in March…updated it a bit in April, and there is a huge list of things I should update to this blog!
here’s part of that hand of God orchestrating my life, to create a beautiful symphony!
I was chatting with a young lady that is training a YWAM to be a missionary.
She was sharing with me how the Lord have been guiding her, and what a joy it is to be in the place which God had planned.
here’s my comment:
One very large prayer is being answered. I am at the church the God called me to 2 years ago. God set me up for going back to the church, by having the pastor be at a doctors appointment that I was at, and I recognized him and I prayed for him.
So I have been able to tell them that I was there when he announced his vision for ministering to the unchurched, the marginalized, and the under cared for in this area. And he was stating that two years ago when I was here helping with my daughter while she had their third baby. At that time they had been praying for a church building, as they were meeting in the back of some government offices. I’ve been praying for this church and for their vision and for the Lord to provide this new church building well new to them because it’s a church building that another church is moving out of, but I’ve been praying for 2 years.
When Faith, our daughter, was telling me about this house that God wanted us to move into, one of the things she said was “oh by the way, your church is just around the corner from your house. Around the corner here does not mean always around the corner, the church is just around the corner on Bears den road” (less Than 3 miles away from our house). That is, the new church building that we are going to be renovating the inside and such and the first sermon is supposed to be the first Sunday in September!!!
THIS was just about the clincher to my saying yes to this house. There are so many other things…but this was KEY!
The other thing, it is such a blessing to sit under a pastor that preaches from God’s word. The United States has so many churches and there are many whose pastors do not preach the word of God. At some point God is going to pour out his judgement on America because we have been given so much in the way of his word, and freedom to live under his word and to share his word. This current generation in our country, has gotten the heart that says if he’s not going to correct me now he’s not going to say anything so go on and sin because God’s not watching. There’s a verse of scripture verse, the talks about that.
Yes, this is me…can’t keep me from stating something about the spiritual needs of the people around me…AND ME!
So what’s the big news about this? It’s that the Lord has allowed us to meet people from the church, and have a real connection between the pastor and his wife, right before I end up going into surgery! There are people in this church that will know of me and that know how to pray to God, how to pray the scriptures, and how to lift me up as I am lying unconscious on the surgery table.
I have had peace about the surgery and the surgeon all along, because I believe God set that up, but now on top of the peace, my heart is again, bursting with joy, that God had my church family planned out for this time, 2 years ago!
the steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord and He Delights in his ways! Though he fall he shall not be cast down, but the Lord holds him up with his right hand.
The points.
2 years ago – I met a chiropractor, Suzanne Shaw, that shared with me about her church.
I attended while staying here for three months to enjoy my daughter and her sons.
The pastor shared his vision, his leading, his confidence that God had provided a church building for them, in which to reach and minister to more people!
My heart was touched…and I hated going back to Florida, because we did not have a church there at the time.
Two years go by, I’ve prayed for the church, but not had contact, other than visits with Dr Shaw when I’ve been here.
The Lord provides a house for our daughter and son-in-law.
The Lord provides a house for us, right next to their property.
The Lord planted all of us within easy driving of the new church building.
The Lord put the pastor and I at the doctors at the same time!
I attend my first service, and he is preaching on covenant…being covenant minded, knowing who we are in Christ and why…speaking life with my tongue, NOT DEATH!! timely message!
Here’s the church website, for Greater Life.
You can follow the instructions on obtaining the podcasts at the greater life website.
The specific sermons are in the Summer of Spiritual Growth, Covenant. So far, there are two parts…though he’s wondering about doing a third next Sunday.
On the youversion app, under events, search for greater life church – boardman. there you will find the notes for these sermons!
What has this to do with my surgery?
Well, to be honest, I would not have moved to Ohio if it weren’t for the cancer.
I would not be having surgery in Cleveland Clinic, if it weren’t for my daughter, and the house near her.
I would not be attending this church if I were in Florida.
My purpose.
There are several.
To be in a living church to serve.
To be in close contact with my children and grandchildren.
To share the gospel.
To write my story.
To serve others and help them to know the peace that passes understanding that is Christ Jesus
Now, a quick touch on chapter 6 – honor your healing. This chapter was NOT what I expected.
Christine set me up!
“the following exercise will help you find your worth in what may feel like wreckage. Instead of wallowing in all the things you cannot do and the ways you feel you are failing, how about you focus on those things you can do and celebrate that?”
28 years of therapy, if not more…and not one has gotten me to do this exercise.
I’m going through this innocent little book…thinking about how I do need to focus upon honoring the pain, so that I don’t undo the surgery(unlike the pelvic lift surgery in which I lifted things too early and felt the ties inside tear!).
“You are not without purpose in who you are and what you can do. We’ve established many ways for you to discover that truth, and I want you to find more!”
Thanks, Christine! You snuck that one in on me!
Seriously…the exercise had you write the gifts that I have that I love.
She has 10 lines.
Turn the page, AND SHE HAS ME FIGURE OUT A PURPOSE FOR EACH GIFT!!!
So, not only have I done an exercise that therapists have begged me to do for decades…I HAVE CREATED AN ACTION PLAN FOR THOSE GIFTS!
If that wasn’t sneaky enough…she inserts poetry here and there…and this one is titled “You are beautiful”.
She follows that poem with Psalm 139:14 Psalm 139:14 King James Version (KJV)
14 I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.
Those that know me know that if you really want to get my attention…speak scripture!!!
So, I yeild!
I cannot do this without my relationship with Jesus. I did not say BELIEF in Jesus…that’s not enough. I needed a REAL relationship…and that is what HE wants with us. if you are interested, follow these links!
Thanks for joining me in this journey, In His hands and under His wings, ~Christi Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.
“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest
Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.
The son of a friend will be interning with CRU – previously known as Campus Crusades for Christ. If you’d like to support someone I can vouch for in this area, please consider going to Matthew Plant’s donation page.
Thanks for joining me in this journey,
