We don’t always get what we want…and one definition of God’s will is exactly what we would choose if we knew all the information.

We are moving into a 38 foot fifth wheel RV.  There is approximately 400 sq feet of space.

Part of that space was used up by a couch that wasn’t working for anyone…except the cats.

One of the requirements we had for a living space is a desk area.  I do a lot on the computer.  All of our photos are on the computer. My writings are on the computer. My digitized paintings are on the computer. I skype with our daughter, and most of my friends all across the country are ‘on’ my computer.  Jim just IS a computer guy, his work and his hobbies are on the computer.  So, a desk for computer work was a necessity!  The desk area options in this model of trailer we not what we wanted.  We chose this one because of all the windows.

We tore the couch out, gaining a 38×72 space, completely surrounded with windows.  The desk we would install couldn’t be taller than 28 inches.  And I wanted something that would look like it belonged in the trailer.  The cabinets are handcrafted cherry raised wood, with some etched glass inserts in corners.  I wanted something comparable.

This one, not the actual one I found, is similar to the one I wanted.  See, even when I want to find a photo of what I wanted, I don’t get what I want!

Anyway – this was $260.
It is from Sauder, The Heritage Hill Collection. It’s not long enough.  It’s too tall.  And it would take up the WHOLE DEPTH of the alcove.  This was my challenge in finding a nice desk.  When I found one, it was $800 – and still would take up the WHOLE alcove – and we realized that we really liked the openess of the alcove without the couch.  Therefore, if we put a desk in it, we would feel even more crowded than with the couch!  Plus, we didn’t have $800 to spend on ONE item for the trailer!

It was suggested that I put a door on top of two file cabinets.  Done that.  We’ve also put a door on top of two pedestals we took off a dresser.  But I really wanted something that would fit, and even a door was going to be too deep for the open feeling. I created a very intricate board for Jim’s desk top, and we talked about using it, but when it became obvious we did not want a very deep desk – that precious desk top was NOT going to work, because we were NOT going to cut it!

So, I gave up.  We went to Wal*Mart and purchased a cheap ($69) desk and shelf set – in plain black.  I was frustrated (which is just a pretty word for mad).  I WANTED something VERY nice, very furniture looking.  And I was SETTLING for some do it yourself Wal*Mart brand.  I am confessing that I was grumpy!  I was, as my best friend says, in a ‘whatever’ mood!

Here’s what we have:

To the right of the desk is a window just like on the right.  I have the shades down!  To my chagrin, this is perfect!  We bolted this down, and we are going to put a cherry shelf extension on top of that bookshelf, just to tie in the cherry, and to give a little more workspace. This size is perfect.  It looks great.  And, it’s everything I could have wanted…if I had known from the beginning what we really wanted!

James 1:17 Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning.
Rom 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to [his] purpose.

I DO want to yield to God’s will for me…because there is this passage that really sounds badly about demanding my OWN way:

Rom 1:21- 22Because that, when they knew God, they glorified [him] not as God, neither were thankful; but became vain in their imaginations, and their foolish heart was darkened. Professing themselves to be wise, they became fools,
1:24 Wherefore God also gave them up to uncleanness through the lusts of their own hearts,
1:25 Who changed the truth of God into a lie, and worshipped and served the creature more than the Creator, who is blessed for ever. Amen.
1:28 And even as they did not like to retain God in [their] knowledge, God gave them over to a reprobate mind, to do those things which are not convenient;

This passage generally is used to point out the sinful nature of homosexuality. But, that is not the only sin that turns a heart away from God. The fact that the persons mentioned here turned their hearts away from God’s will starts a downward spiral:

Rom 1:29 Being filled with all unrighteousness, fornication, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, debate, deceit, malignity; whisperers, 30 Backbiters, haters of God, despiteful, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents, 31 Without understanding, covenant breakers, without natural affection, implacable, unmerciful:

Rom 1:32 is to all that participate in any of these activities:

Who knowing the judgment of God, that they which commit such things are worthy of death, not only do the same, but have pleasure in them that do them.

And, it ties in with Rev 21:8

But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.

James 1: 14-15 But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed. Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death.

I believe that God has a plan for my life. (Jer 29:11)
I believe that God is interested in every detail of my life.
I believe that God is sovereign, and therefore I should yield to Him in every area of my life.
I believe that when I put my desires above God’s, and that is usually indicated by my lack of patience, my anxiety levels, and my shortness with others, I am putting MY way above HIS way, and that is idolatry.

Saul learned that the hard way – by making decisions about how to fight a battle:

1 Sam 15:23 For rebellion [is as] the sin of witchcraft, and stubbornness [is as] iniquity and idolatry. Because thou hast rejected the word of the LORD, he hath also rejected thee from [being] king.

I do NOT want to be guilty of rejecting God’s word for me.  The most important thing in my life is my salvation. The second most important thing is the salvation of my friends and family. And there are times that I get impatient with the lack of God’s hand. It always turns out, it’s not HIS hand that is slack or slow…it’s my eyes that are closed!

2 Pet 3:9 The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.

I want my life to glorify God.  Therefore, I have to LISTEN and TRUST and OBEY!  In my heart and mind, everything in life is an act of worship – every breath that I take……every move or  step I take…every song I sing…My life is IN the LORD! So, even when it comes to a silly desk, God didn’t think it was silly! He prevented me from getting what I thought I wanted, and led me to what really fills my heart with Joy!

Here is my prayer, that my life would be worship!

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,
~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

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